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Newest Member: Conflicted345

Reconciliation :
Thankful Thursday

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The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 1:36 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

I am grateful for my son who is home this college semester.

We are having some fun together— though this has not been a great semester for him. Online learning has not been going well for him (or so many others).

He has made some amazing meals and cooks for himself and friends. He now has a skill to last a lifetime. This was a kid who would eat cereal for dinner as opposed to cooking.

I highly suggest the copycat Chic Fil A chicken breast sandwich. Brined in buttermilk an pickle juice - it’s to die for. My son got that recipe and made it. Yum!!

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 11 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.

posts: 14250   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8608659
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 3:06 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

LemonSpearmint...no one else knows about my H's A...so this place is a Godsend to me . Even if everyone knew...they don't KNOW the pain that infidelity brings like people on here. I am so glad you have an outlet to go to...like all the rest of us...THANK YOU SI!!!

Tanner...kudos to your wife for bring the unopened message to you . HUGE step for you to act the way you did too !!! I used to believe that ALL men were dogs...they would hump anyone who let them. Thanks to you STRONG BH's on here...I am very happy to know I was WRONG . The INTEGRITY y'all have is very awe inspiring! Thank you for sharing your post!

sunwillshine...it's actually nice to see you forget at times. That means there are more important things in your life than to remember this place...even though it is a pretty awesome place !! I wish I could do scrapbooking. I have seen some of the scrapbooks that friends have done...and they are so NICE!! I am not that creative!!! Your H handled things so well from your trigger over that photo too...YAY to Mr. Sunwillshine !!

The1stWife...I can't imagine what it is like to have children going through all of the online classes for college. I am sure the colleges were prepared because colleges and universities have been heading toward that direction for a while...but I can imagine that they don't get the same experience and knowledge as they would in a traditional classroom. One thing about this though is that families are getting to stay as a unit...which is a PLUS . Thanks also for the tip on the chicken sandwich!!

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8608689
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leavingorbit ( member #69680) posted at 3:08 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

I’m grateful to be able to sit next to my husband and hear him sing The Parting Glass to our son for his lullaby. Life is very beautiful. Thank you, everyone.

When we drop fear, we can draw nearer to people, we can draw nearer to the earth, we can draw nearer to all the heavenly creatures that surround us. - bell hooks

posts: 236   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2019
id 8608691
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 3:49 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

leavingorbit...life can be very beautiful...such as the picture you just gave in your post. Thanks for that .

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8608720
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Oldwounds ( member #54486) posted at 4:04 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

Happy belated Marine Corps Birthday to you...and in honor of Veterans Day...thank you for your service

Too kind as always, but thanks. I think most old Jarheads are pretty happy to have served -- it certainly wasn't for the money (as Mr. W2BHA knows).

I am especially grateful for the PEACE I feel after discussions like this.

W2BHA -- Any moments of peace these days are a good thing!

Married 36+ years, together 41+ years
Two awesome adult sons.
Dday 6/16 4-year LTA Survived.
M Restored
"It is better to conquer our grief than to deceive it." — Seneca

posts: 4781   ·   registered: Aug. 4th, 2016   ·   location: Home.
id 8608734
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 7:48 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

It looks like a Christmas bomb went off at home. Is it possible to make new conditions for R, like no more Pinterest or Hobby Lobby?

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3607   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8608859
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sunwillshine ( member #47200) posted at 8:19 PM on Friday, November 13th, 2020

Is it possible to make new conditions for R, like no more Pinterest or Hobby Lobby?

LMAO and no!

I would not be able to exist without being creative. Hobby Lobby and Pinterest or how to you tubes are a must for my female soul.

Of course, I like to have Thanksgiving before Christmas. But that's just me.

D-day 2/12/15
5 DD (3 his, 2 mine) all grown
married 9/97 together 8/94.
Moved back in 5/30/16 working on R

posts: 1136   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2015
id 8608873
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 5:25 PM on Thursday, November 19th, 2020

I’m thankful for some good news. We have 12 yo twin boys with autism, one is severe, non verbal, and has had several medical issues. He is about a 2 yo level. Other than that he runs around and plays with other kids like any kid. The past couple weeks we have been in and out of the hospital with him, dealing with a blood issue, we have been bracing ourselves for a leukemia diagnosis.

Yesterday we talked to the oncologist and he has ruled out leukemia and believes it’s a side affect of one of the seizure medications.

It’s such a relief, but we knew our boy is a fighter and if anyone can overcome something like that it would be him.

His first year of life he spent 7 months in the hospital struggling to stay alive. They were ready to release him on hospice to go home and die. We fought for him and found the right Drs and he is happy loving boy today.

I’m thankful for the good news and my Wife’s momma bear instincts. She has fought and advocated for him his whole life.

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3607   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8610599
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 5:45 PM on Thursday, November 19th, 2020

Tanner...that is GREAT news !!!

My thankful Thursday post is I am so thankful that my H will be coming home soon from an out of state job . This isn't uncommon...that is part of what happens in my H's career field. But it truly doesn't trigger me in the least anymore ! My H used to get on Craigslist and Tagged when we were apart before. His porn watching was UNREAL too...I had no idea how much he looked at porn until after Dday. But NOW...he goes to his Devotional . He doesn't have to HIDE what he does now...and WE get to discuss what all he reads and does. It doesn't seem like much...but to ME...it is HUGE!!

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8610609
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sunwillshine ( member #47200) posted at 2:30 AM on Friday, November 20th, 2020

Tanner - that is great News! It is so hard when our children are ill.

Thankful Thursday for me this time is that every thing and every one close to me are doing well. I heard about a very tragic incident today, involving a co-worker. His wife was killed in a car accident Tuesday night. Leaving behind her husband and 6 year old daughter. 😥

Life is so short and can be ended so suddenly. Therefore, I have nothing to complain about and everything to be grateful for.

I know how hard it is to recover from the trauma of infidelity and I'm hoping every one can find something to be thankful for.

D-day 2/12/15
5 DD (3 his, 2 mine) all grown
married 9/97 together 8/94.
Moved back in 5/30/16 working on R

posts: 1136   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2015
id 8610759
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 6:50 PM on Tuesday, November 24th, 2020

Since this Thursday I will be a little busy with my immediate family celebrating a very THANKFUL Thanksgiving...I am going to post my "Thankful Thursday" post on Tuesday !!! Besides...I am feeling very THANKFUL today for what happened this morning .

My H and I read a daily email from Kim Kimberling's "Today's One Thing". TODAY's one thing talked about getting your spouse a special card to tell them you love them . Because I am OLD...as I started making the desserts we are having for Thanksgiving...I quickly forgot about it . But my H didn't . He went to get something from the hardware store...then passed by Walmart to get me a card...and a croissanwich from Burger King too! He handed me the croissanwich on the card "platter" .

He then got a phone call...so I quickly got an ecard to send to him !! A little later I went back into the kitchen to finish getting the ingredients ready for what I was making...and came across a bag on the counter that wasn't there before. Puzzled...I picked it up...and realized it was a bag that had more cards in it *does a happy dance*!!! My H walked in right about then and snatched the bag away...but he knew that I KNEW from my HAPPY face !!! We had a little laugh...because we are both OLD and forgetful !!! So now I am anticipating getting more cards throughout the day...or days . It is a small thing I know...but it makes a HUGE impact !

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8611872
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 4:04 PM on Thursday, November 26th, 2020

I have a few minutes...so I want to wish EVERYONE a very THANKFUL Thursday !!!

There is ALWAYS something to be thankful for...and I am so thankful for the MANY friends and family I have come to know from this site!!

Happy Thanksgiving to those who are celebrating it today!!!

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8612313
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TwoDozen ( member #74796) posted at 4:14 PM on Thursday, November 26th, 2020

My 1st post in the Thankful Thursday thread

Today I am thankful for my best friend of 35 years. Exactly one yeah ago today I reached out to him and told him my darkest fears, and as a grown ass man I cried down the phone for close to thirty minutes. He was there for me, he was there for me 3 weeks later on Dday, through the gaslighting and TT and has been ever since.

I am thankful that I am not alone in this world and no matter what the world throws at me I have my brother from another mother to pick me up when I am down. As I would and have done for him many times.

You won’t be reading this but Thankyou man, I would not be here today without you. 👊🏻

[This message edited by TwoDozen at 10:19 AM, November 26th (Thursday)]

posts: 443   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2020
id 8612315
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BraveSirRobin ( member #69242) posted at 6:07 PM on Thursday, November 26th, 2020

This time last year, I had just been told that my DD might see Thanksgiving morning from a hospital bed. She had stresses that were crushing her, and it felt like there was nothing I could do to help. If we had known she was staring down the barrel of 2020 -- isolation from friends, no prom, no graduation -- I would have been even more terrified.

Two days ago, she came home from her first semester of college healthy, happy, and healing. The school had solid Covid protocols and enforced them, which didn't make for a thriving campus social life, but it enabled them to spend the whole term on campus. She aced her classes and found the little group of people she needed. And after years of dodging unwanted male attention, she's mutually smitten with a guy who thinks the world of her.

There are many, many challenges we still have, but today, I'm thankful beyond words that my daughter has found her peaceful and sunny space.

[This message edited by BraveSirRobin at 11:54 PM, November 26th (Thursday)]

WW/BW

posts: 3672   ·   registered: Dec. 27th, 2018
id 8612331
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 11:26 PM on Thursday, November 26th, 2020

Happy Thanksgiving, the ultimate thankful Thursday. I’m so thankful for my family. We got to see our grown kids, and grandkids. I’m so proud of our kids they have grown up to be successful adults.

I really hate that my W had to do what she did on this 30 year journey, but I couldn’t ask for more from her right now. She has been solid for a year now.

She hasn’t spoken to her Dad in a couple years, he called her today and made her day. I told her don’t take that lightly (my Dad passed in August) I would give anything to get a call from my Dad.

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3607   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8612387
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 4:49 PM on Thursday, December 3rd, 2020

Happy Thankful Thursday all you wonderful people !!! Most people know that my H and I travel a lot together for his job. We just got back from a short trip...and I am very thankful for us to be HOME .

We both made decisions over 6 years ago that would have kept this from being our home. Thankfully we decided to try and work on R...and our home has remained intact! It was worth the work for sure...and I am so THANKFUL for the choice we BOTH made to stay together .

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8613954
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Neanderthal ( member #71141) posted at 6:04 PM on Thursday, December 3rd, 2020

I'm thankful for the opportunity to have a relationship with my sister. We hadn't spoken or seen each other in almost 20 years. She was diagnosed with cancer early this year. I opened the door with a simple text in March. Since then we've talked a lot. I brought my daughter to visit her and her kids. It was a wonderful visit. I am so grateful my daughter got to meet her Aunt and cousins.

Today she had a seizure and is back in the hospital. I was really hoping she would make it through the holidays with her children. It's not looking good.

I am so damn thankful to see her this year. I couldn't even remember what she looked like before hand.

*Edit to add: Sorry I just realized this was in the R forum. My post doesn't exactly fit.*

[This message edited by Neanderthal at 1:01 PM, December 3rd (Thursday)]

Me: WS/BS

posts: 439   ·   registered: Jul. 30th, 2019   ·   location: OK
id 8613967
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MrsWalloped ( member #62313) posted at 6:05 PM on Thursday, December 3rd, 2020

I am so thankful for my wonderful SI family and friends who keep me sane, hold me accountable with love, always have my best interests at heart and for being there when I need someone to turn to.

Me: WW 47
My BH: Walloped 48
A: 3/15 - 8/15 (2 month EA, turned into 3 month PA)
DDay: 8/3/15
In R

posts: 769   ·   registered: Jan. 17th, 2018
id 8613968
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 7:51 PM on Thursday, December 3rd, 2020

Neanderthal...I think your post fits perfectly Dear Sir . What a GIFT you gave to her by reaching out! It looks like she gave you a gift too by answering back .

MrsWalloped...what a beautiful sentiment...thank you for sharing it .

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6668   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8614010
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1492 ( member #44831) posted at 1:45 AM on Friday, December 4th, 2020

I am grateful for my husband now, it has been many years coming. Reconciliation has been difficult to say the very least, but it has come.

We both have suffered many losses in the last year and my H has been very supportive. We were going to go shopping and take care of errands the other day and I just could not get ready to go. All of a sudden I realized how late it was and that he had been just sitting talking with me. I said “you should have said something “ . He said to me that he realized I just needed to talk.

I realize that may not be a big deal to many, but to me, it was a huge change from many years of not talking. Today I am very grateful for the husband he has become.

[This message edited by 1492 at 8:50 PM, December 3rd, 2020 (Thursday)]

Dday June 2012
BW age 63 on d day
WH age 64 on d day
2020 it’s been a long road

posts: 1136   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2014
id 8614084
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