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freetogonow (original poster member #57821) posted at 5:45 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
This is my third Christmas alone since dday. I live by myself in a very small house with my five dogs.
I have not had a Christmas tree since. I don’t want to unpack the ornaments of 24 years of marriage. I use the excuse that my house is too small for a tree (it’s extremely small, 1 bedroom and less than 700 square feet plus I work from home). And it’s just me and the dogs so why bother.
My friend Pat got wind that I didn’t have a tree.
This morning I walked out into my garage. I keep my garage doors open all the time (I live on an 8 acre fenced in ranch so this is not unsafe to do) and I go in and out of the house through my garage. Anyway there was a tiny Christmas tree! Maybe 3 feet tall with decorations and lights and everything.
There was a card on the tree branches. I opened it up and it was from Pat! She conspired with some other people from my church to help her buy the tree and get it set up, delivered and decorated. Pat is 88 years old and in assisted living 20 miles from where I live but she knows how to get the job done.
I stood in my garage and cried. This is the nicest thing anyone’s done for me in a long time. There are even dog ornaments on the tree.
Now I have a Christmas that’s just mine. With ornaments that are just mine from my awesome friend. It doesn’t involve WH in any way.
I’m going to pull down my boxes of Christmas stuff. Go through and save out the handmade ornaments from when my son was little and made things in school. And give the rest away to goodwill.
ShatteredSakura ( member #70885) posted at 6:14 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
That is a lovely and inspiring story, have a Merry Christmas!
marriageredux959 ( member #69375) posted at 6:20 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
That's wonderful. I am happy for you. Merry Christmas! :)
I was once a June bride.
I am now a June phoenix.
The phoenix is more powerful.
The Bride is Dead.
Long Live The Phoenix.
Dragonfly123 ( member #62802) posted at 8:22 AM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
What a super surprise, it must give you that sense of being loved every time you look at it! Merry Christ Free To... I hope you have a wonderful time!
When you can’t control what’s happening, challenge yourself to control the way you respond to what’s happening. That’s where the power is.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 5:44 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
This is why I like Christmas even though I'm Jewish.
This tree is a wonderful gift, and one that you deserved (if there's any question in your mind about that).
This Pat sounds like a fantastic person. 
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
cptprkchp ( member #11719) posted at 5:49 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
That is amazing!
I’m so happy that you have such thoughtful and great friend! Merry Christmas to you - you are free to enjoy it now 
3greatkids ( member #69847) posted at 7:25 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
What a thoughtful friend. Enjoy your new tree!
You can’t get blood from a turnip...or remorse from a narcissist.
A lifetime of betrayals, not “just” 5.
I know my worth.
demolishedinside ( member #47839) posted at 8:13 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
This is wonderful! What a great surprise. Merry Christmas!
BS - me/3 kids
DD - April 2015 / SA-Jan. 28, 2017
DD2- October 23, 2018
Divorced and happy
burninghouse ( member #63308) posted at 8:24 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
So heartwarming! Thank you for sharing this. Pat is a wonderful lady to orchestrate such a sweet and thoughtful surprise. Merry Christmas!
BW (me)
WH (him)
D-day 3/2018
Divorcing
Reminding myself often, "The last of the human freedoms: to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Viktor Frankl
DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 8:50 PM on Wednesday, December 25th, 2019
Way to go Pat!!!
What an amazing beautiful gift. I'm in happy tears.
Merry Christmas my dear.
(We have a pretty nice sized house and we dont have a large tree. It's a three foot table tree that simply gets wrapped in a huge bag and put on a shelf downstairs lol)
[This message edited by DragnHeart at 7:54 PM, December 25th (Wednesday)]
Me: BS 46 WH: 37 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons. Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that. Now up to PA #5. Serial fucking Cheater.
BetterTimesAhead ( member #70001) posted at 1:38 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
Pat sounds amazing. It made me happy to read your story. Best wishes for your new Christmas tradition!
Me: BS - 56 Him: WH - 57 DDAY: 2/22/2019 - Three year EA and PA Filed for D 9/2021 - signed the papers 8/2023 - time to rebuild***************An apology without the action to back it up is just manipulation.
WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 2:13 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
Yaaaaay!!! This so heartwarming, ftgn!! You were so tired the other day...and now this. Good karma delivers just as well as bad. You so deserved this, sweet lady.
PS:. I changed out most of my ornaments this year, as well. Any bad juju stuff went in the trash or donation pile. I'm glad you plan to do the same. It is so cathartic!!
[This message edited by WhoTheBleep at 8:13 PM, December 25th (Wednesday)]
I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural
Stumblingon ( member #71711) posted at 2:27 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
What a thoughtful surprise. Wishing you all the joy you deserve for the new year.
20yrsagoBS ( member #55272) posted at 3:33 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
BW, 54 WH 53 When you lie down with dogs, you wake up with fleas
StillLivin ( member #40229) posted at 4:36 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
What a beautiful act of live and kindness. Yes, after the first Christmas, I did the same. I pretty much gutted everything I had and got new stuff by my second Christmas. And man was that freeing!
I've enjoyed Christmas ever since. New tree, new decorations, new me.
"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB: 7/2/2014
de.va.sta.ted ( member #22922) posted at 5:42 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
Friends are the very best. You have a great one in Pat, and all her helpers. Very happy for you.
Me: BW Him: WH D-Day 1: February 2009 D-Day 2: April 2018 Divorced!
OwningItNow ( member #52288) posted at 6:03 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
me: BS/WS h: WS/BS
Reject the rejector. Do not reject yourself.
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 9:09 AM on Thursday, December 26th, 2019
A Christmas blessing! Pay it forward however you can.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
Tallgirl ( member #64088) posted at 4:19 PM on Friday, December 27th, 2019
Wow, a true friend and gift
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