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devasted30 ( member #39439) posted at 3:47 PM on Thursday, May 1st, 2014
(((((Phoenix))))) keeping you in my thoughts and prayers
And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!
StillStanding1 ( member #40144) posted at 5:09 PM on Thursday, May 1st, 2014
Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers. You have been unbelievably strong, courageous, graceful, and giving during the most grievous of circumstances. I am praying for your continued courage and strength to face the difficult days that will still be coming. I hope that your DD's and other friends are able to give you the support you need and deserve.
Me: BS50s Him: WH50s
M 25 years - DD DS DS
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday - 2/13, S for 1 year, now R
Phoenix1 (original poster member #38928) posted at 5:55 AM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
Every time I think I can stand up and breath I get kicked in the gut. I can't get into details, but DS's estate may end up involving a lawsuit. And I thought I was going to have a quick trip to bro's memorial service Saturday and I get a call from one niece crying about fighting between the two of them and she doesn't know what to do. Now I have to have a "come to Jesus" meeting with them after the service to tell them to grow up. I don't sugar coat words with them, and they know it. I will also be informing them that I didn't appreciate them dressing like hookers at DS's funeral either. If someone doesn't tell them, they will never learn just how inappropriate it was. I will be the only family member there besides them on Saturday as all family is closer to the state where the second service will be held. The one in WA is for their many WA friends and colleagues.
Then I find out DS's GF will be at the location where I will be picking up DS's BF. He was the one who gave me the heads up. There is real bad blood with the GF. Guess she had purchased a ticket to go to WA for DS's birthday previously and is still planning to go. Not sure why, and she is the last person I want to see during this highly stressful day, and Lord help her if she attempts to go to DS's memorial site when I am there!!. Ugh...
Going to cemetery tomorrow to put 21 white carnations on DS's grave, then leaving on a red eye tomorrow night for WA. Will be back home about 24 hr's later. Then DS's father and I have a meeting on base here for more paperwork first thing on Monday morning.
My "give a damn" is about this close <--> to being completely busted, but my love and convictions for both bro and DS compel me to trudge thru when all I really want to do is run away and sleep for a month. My current glass of wine is tasting better and better...
[This message edited by Phoenix1 at 11:58 PM, May 1st (Thursday)]
fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!
You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~
woundedwidow ( member #36869) posted at 12:55 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
I'm SO sorry you have all these additional stressors on top of all that you have already borne, and have to bear still. I hope and pray that you can dredge up the strength to get through your brother's memorial service and the visit to your DS' memorial site, as well as attending to the necessary paperwork with DS' father. The end of all the official processing is at least in sight now, and hopefully you will soon have time and space to decompress and personally process all that has happened. My love and prayers go out to you now and during that future period, and all the years to come as well. (((Hugs))) to you, Phoenix1
Be careful what you wish for the most - you may get it.
5454real ( member #37455) posted at 1:09 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
((( Phoenix)))
good lord, I am sorry about the additional stress.
sending strength and prayers.
BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle
lordhasaplan? ( member #30079) posted at 2:10 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
Sending strength your way. Phoenix, I wish you peace today. A deep breath in the moment. When you exhale, remember we are here to help.
BS- Me (45)D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10). Currently in R.Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.
weeping willow ( member #22800) posted at 6:05 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
I'm holding you close to my heart, and praying for you to have the strength to get through the coming days.
(((Phoenix & family)))
BW - me FWH - him
D Day - July 26, 2007
Married 40 years
yearsofpain25 ( member #42012) posted at 6:09 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
Still thinking of you. I hope all goes well with your come to Jesus meeting. Sorry you even have to deal with that.
Sending you strength and peace.
"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 6:16 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
((((Phoenix)))) Hope all goes as smoothly and as drama free as possible over the next few days, honey. Sending you continued strength and comfort.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 6:41 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
Sending more prayers and hugs to your today.
I am so sorry things just keep piling up for you. You know that "every storm runs out of rain" (gary allen song). And sweetie, you have been in the storm way too long, so the end has to be coming soon.
You are truly an amazing woman.
Happy Birthday to DS and sending prayers for him too.
**my offer still stands**
Me: BSHim: WHDDay: LTEA Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen
D final 2/23
norabird ( member #42092) posted at 7:09 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 10:28 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014
(((Phoenix1))) You're still in my thoughts for some peace and freedom to mourn.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
Violated ( member #21239) posted at 1:19 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
((((Phoenix)))) sending prayers and strength today.
SpecialK ( member #42372) posted at 2:35 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
Can't think of anything to say that hasn't already been said, just want you to know if prayer, faith, and compassion can get a person through this hell, then you have all of them in abundance.
May God hold you, bless you, and protect you.
jjct ( member #17484) posted at 2:40 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
(((Phoenix))) We're all here holding you.
veronique12 ( member #42185) posted at 2:59 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
BW, D-Day: 11/29/13 (4 month EA discovered); 12/19/13 (discovered was also PA); TT thru 2/14
Married: 2001; Together for 20 years
2 beautiful young kids
still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 3:44 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
Sending you all the mojo you need to get thru today.
Sending prayers for you today.
Me: BSHim: WHDDay: LTEA Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen
D final 2/23
devasted30 ( member #39439) posted at 4:32 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
Thinking of you today and giving as much support as you need.
And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:14 PM on Saturday, May 3rd, 2014
((((Phoenix))))
Continuing to hold you in my thoughts and sending strength your way. Was thinking of you just now.
hexed ( member #19258) posted at 2:51 AM on Sunday, May 4th, 2014
(((PHOENIX))))
Hope you're getting through today. Thinking of you.
But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler
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