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SuspiciousWife ( member #18108) posted at 2:21 AM on Thursday, May 13th, 2010
Was someone looking for this?
Me - BW, 44
Him - FWH, 44
OW - former co-worker
3 great kids
DDay - April 25, 2008 - mostly EA with one make-out session
oldtimer97 ( member #2365) posted at 1:46 PM on Thursday, May 13th, 2010
Yeah, my eyes must be getting old. I couldn't find it in our existing pages. I know we've lost a lot, as noted in the cumulative list that SerJ made. Glad you found it!
“When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”
― Maya Angelou
To save a marriage, you must be willing to lose the marriage.
Cee64D ( member #21836) posted at 9:32 AM on Saturday, May 15th, 2010
Bumpage
The hardest part of forgiveness is accepting it from others...
Me BH 44
Clarrissa FWW 44
D-Day 04 Oct, 2008
woundedby2 ( member #18522) posted at 8:27 PM on Monday, May 17th, 2010
In 2010 I divorced the NPD assclown who cheated on me with my best friend.
Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson
seeking wisdom ( member #14156) posted at 11:36 AM on Thursday, May 20th, 2010
BS in WXH's exit affair.
Hold the fort. It gets better.
justbreathe ( member #13765) posted at 1:11 AM on Sunday, May 23rd, 2010
In times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.
George Orwell
unarmbears ( member #7480) posted at 3:22 AM on Tuesday, May 25th, 2010
bump
Remember to eat and breathe!
FBS-Me, 67
FWH-Him, 62
2 Sons 33 and 38
2 Daughters 36 & 31 And 5 darling grandchildren!
"Love is an impulsive act, it's free. It's the story we tell about it afterward that's our poverty." Byron Katie
Cogal ( member #28314) posted at 5:22 AM on Wednesday, May 26th, 2010
I wish after d-day #1 I had made him move out and started NC. After d-day #2 I should have started the D process and after d-day #3 I should have been DONE. Any WS who is more worried about losing/hurting the OP than they are about you is not on the road to R, lol.
And if you allow them home and have no game plan (like the one suggested here on page 1) be prepared for it to draaaaaggggg on. There has to be ACTION to save the M or you will be miserable.
But as they say, you'll know when your done. Took me a lot of shit and over a year to get here, and while hindsight is
20/20, I had to work thru it all, get hurt along the way, learn who I was and what I wanted to know it was over.
Me (bw): 30 something
exH NPD: 30 something
kids: preschool twins
d-day 4/09 (7 month EA/PA)
married 10 years
divorced and ready for 2011
It's not that I have trust issues, it's that you shouldn't trust some people!
Neverinamillion ( member #28155) posted at 10:41 AM on Wednesday, May 26th, 2010
If I had done everything I wished I had done, I'd probably be awaiting trial right now. LOL
Me-35
WW-35
D-Day-Jan 15 2010
Kids: 16,12,10,7
cass ( member #24261) posted at 7:14 PM on Sunday, May 30th, 2010
DDay - April 2008
Me - 58 and doing great, alone.
Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket!
romanticidiot ( member #28655) posted at 7:43 PM on Monday, May 31st, 2010
I just started the 180 two days ago, and this post has been helpful. If ever I waver, I will refer back to it.
"When you're going through Hell, keep going." -Churchill
flowermom ( member #23950) posted at 8:42 PM on Monday, May 31st, 2010
Please keep this available for the newbies! I wish I had access to it. it would have helped so much. Thanks!!!
Me-BS WHSA, 3 wonderful kids, all grown.
Denial is not just a river in Egypt
hitbyatruck ( member #23769) posted at 6:16 AM on Tuesday, June 1st, 2010
I would have forced myself to 180 from day 1. I sucked at the 180. I cried, I screamed, I fought with him months after he left. To him I did look the pathetic crazy wife he left at home.
As soon as I began to date a little and look happy he wanted to come home, go figure.
Him wanting to come back is almost as scary as when he left.
Married 1998. 2 kids. First discovery 3/2009. Multiple affairs, porn addiction. one failed attempt at R. Nested for over a year. Divorce final 8/2015. XH is now married. I am engaged!
Lotsa ( member #28078) posted at 5:39 AM on Wednesday, June 2nd, 2010
MumToTwo ( member #13227) posted at 8:13 AM on Friday, June 4th, 2010
bump
Don't think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches
SuspiciousWife ( member #18108) posted at 10:21 PM on Tuesday, June 8th, 2010
Someone already bumped Tactical Primer today, so here is the other essential thread.
Me - BW, 44
Him - FWH, 44
OW - former co-worker
3 great kids
DDay - April 25, 2008 - mostly EA with one make-out session
whatdoto ( member #28555) posted at 10:54 PM on Tuesday, June 8th, 2010
I wish I had said something to WH when I saw the signs.
Not wanting sex much anymore, calling me at work alot and not talking (just calling) and looking so depressed all the time.
"If your ideal image of yourself is in the future, it's going to stay there".
nofun ( member #24546) posted at 12:12 AM on Wednesday, June 9th, 2010
The one thing I wish I had done....was....kick his ass to the curb the day I confronted him.....Great post...Bravo!
BS (me) 64
WH 68
M 44 yrs
OW - 64 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09 DD2 11/20/2019
LTA 20 years
Confused: heading to separate
willthiseverend ( member #25107) posted at 11:48 PM on Friday, June 11th, 2010
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
redrock ( member #21538) posted at 3:46 AM on Friday, June 18th, 2010
I don't respect anyone that can't spell a word more than one way:)
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