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(((TCMM)))

What a POS your STBXW is. Please make sure you are documenting everything.

I hope you are keeping a diary that thoroughly documents her comings and goings. If not, start NOW. you can write it on a day planner, a calendar, or just a notebook. And definitely keep all of her texts.

[This message edited by tulipcitymadman at 8:43 PM, October 20th (Wednesday)]

TCMM,

I've been thinking about your other thread - the one in which you mentioned that she blamed you for multiple yeast infections from having sex.

That screams self-loathing to me. I mean of course that she is experiencing significant self-loathing. I wonder if part of the appeal of the OM was that he made her feel "dirty." Some people get off on that sort of thing. But, eventually, that thrill does wear off and the person ends up feeling... well... dirty.

So maybe the thrill of him and his nasty trailer and the secrecy and all that is wearing off and now she is just really feeling dirty and not in a good, sexy way, but just in a gross, I-just-had-sex-in-this-weirdo's-trailer kind of way.

So she blame-shifts back to you and remembers the few times she had a yeast infection and - voila! - you're the dirty one now, TCMM.

Just a thought for you.

Hang in there, friend.

Someone on here has a signature that quotes winston churchill: "If you find yourself going through hell, keep going."

I like the part where she says she married you for security and because she loved you mom - then later suggests you pitch your mom in a nursing home and runs off to the trailer to sleep with her boyfriend. Yuck.

Screaming and swearing in front of the children while they beg her to stop plus staying out all night with her boyfriend and she thinks she's "there for the kids"? Well, keep your evidence safe from prying eyes. 50/50 custody should not be an issue. I have divorced and coparenting family in Michigan with 50/50 custody and it was not an easy divorce, so it's possible TCMM. Don't be discouraged.

But one last thing- you should really stop engaging her. You have enough text and recorded evidence of her terrible behavior to demonstrate to any professional that she's got a screw loose. Now for your own emotional state you should disengage. Seriously.

[This message edited by tulipcitymadman at 8:43 PM, October 20th (Wednesday)]

You have been doing a wonderful job at keeping NC as much as you can with this psychobitch, so I wouldn't get upset with yourself over your texting. I highly doubt that anyone on this board can say they have been 100% NC while dealing face-to-face with their FT's. I know I broke my the other night when I told him that I hoped he would learn to think with his head instead of his dick.

...you know I have known a few prostitutes in my life, and one thing I can say for them is they were all honest with their customers that it was all about the money, and not one of them ever married a client, so I have to say calling your wife a whore is kind of an insult to whores...

[This message edited by Cabrona at 1:47 PM, September 15th (Wednesday)]

A respite and a small vacation from my in house detention that is a bit more than 4 months underway with slightly less than 4 months to go, as long as no one makes any sudden moves. She has left the building, and for the first time in a while a cool breeze blows through my kitchen. My daughters are snug in their bed while my son is messing around on the computer. I have the feeling that I just came up from great depth without sufficient time to acclimate. I am relieved to be up from the deep, but am feeling uneasy about being on the surface, albeit for just a few days.

She is out with the OM again and I never thought I would say this, but I am glad. She is gone and I can be with my kids in a way that I cannot when she is stalking the house. We went downtown for a local event that my older DD wanted to see and we had a blast! My new nickname is “mayor” because my daughters do not understand what it is like to live in this town for an entire life. They are always telling me “Dad, anytime we go anywhere, you know everybody!” so therefore I must be the mayor of our town. (Remember that I have a bit of social anxiety so I find this all so amusing). I am going to sleep in our marital bed for the first time in ages. It will be good to have to have something other than the thin mattress and dubious construction of said futon to lay my head on for a change.

For anyone who is ensconced in their little spot in their house waiting out the divorce to be final, I can say that life does get so much better once your life is your own. And it will be for me at some point, just not yet. In the interim, this is more than good enough.

Good for you TCMM...

Hope you got a good nights sleep...

Here's to ya... "mayor"

WB

TCMM - enjoy your wonderful weekend. You deserve a break .. and it looks like you're almost halfway there.

Also - a suggestion for the futon. Target and similar stores sell egg crate foam mattress pads. I bought a twin size one for $10 for the pack n plays that the twins use when we vacation.

It's a little luxury item that won't cost you much and might make your dungeon fortress a little more comfy.

Enjoy your weekend with your children! It will be a wonderful time for all of you until the Bitch is back!

Sometimes you just have to give your head a shake and wounder what you ever saw in her. Last Christmas you were a family, now she's some trailer park skank's piece, how did it get there. What can she be thinking about her future, she and the kids all living happily in trailer park land with the overweight bald guy? All those people sharing a bathroom, or is she expecting you to leave so trailer park boy can move in? That would explain his wanting to get the pool up and running.

[This message edited by tulipcitymadman at 8:44 PM, October 20th (Wednesday)]

Your stbx is a real piece of work!

Sometimes I wonder (for all of us), when will the crazy train ever stop?

Kudos to you for maintaining your sanity through all the shit.

Wow, she really is nuts.

What's the date you can officially divorce her?

Focus on that and get a big ass countdown clock/calendar for your kitchen wall.

I like that countdown idea, but get the big number one that you remove a number everyday until you get to Zero. At zero have the name and phone number of a moving company. Start bringing moving boxes home, wrapping paper, let it sink in for her. She was good at letting your marriage sink, maybe she will bring the same luck to his business.

Hmmm... think she's opened her eyes and realized that the OM's income won't QUITE support her current lifestyle?

Perhaps she's putting just a wee bit of pressure on OM to build his business a bit.

[snort]

Keep running, WW, keep running. Those consequences are coming at you fast and furious.

Good idea from FaithFool and Aliveagain about getting a big calendar and doing a countdown on this! It will empower you further and help you focus as the day draws near for this hell to be over for good!!!

Best of luck ((((TCMM))))

I know it is not nice to wish evil on a person --- but I have to say that I am looking forward to hearing about her being a sobbing, whining, pleading mess about 2 weeks after the D is final and she has to move into the trailer and start her glamorous new life.