SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

A young goalkeeper hanged himself after his fiancée left him for his team mate

Dale Roberts, 24, killed himself after his 25-year-old partner Lindsay Cowen had an affair with his Rushden and Diamonds team mate Paul Terry.

Lindsey admitted the affair when a suspicious Dale confronted her at their home in Higham Ferrers, Nothamptonshire.

Last night, the 24-year-old was found dead in the house. Police said there are no suspicious circumstances surrounding the death.

Roberts was left heartbroken by the split and struggled to cope with losing his fiancée, according to friends.

A source said: 'They (Lindsay and Paul) became an item after Paul stayed the night at the couple's home in Higham Ferrers when Dale was injured.

'All hell broke loose and Paul ended up being released as the rest of the team didn't want to play in the same side as him. 'Dale has been heartbroken about it ever since.'

Heartbroken Dale, 24, said at the time of the affair: 'It's true, she told me she'd been seeing Paul.

'We've split up. I'm trying to get my head around it all, it's only just happened. I'm a bit messed up.

'It is bad enough she's done it at all but the fact that it is with him, one of my team-mates, makes it that much harder to bear.'

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1338852/Rushden-Diamonds-goalkeeper-Dale-Roberts-hung-fiances-affair.html#ixzz18CSrHKTd

Summerbaby posted a couple of days ago that her OPBH committed suicide. Infidelity opens so deep deep wounds. It's so hard to heal from it all.

~ Sabina

About a month after D-Day #1, my WH went to a funeral of a friend he knew from high school and met up with occasionally over the years. He supposedly committed suicide because he found out his 2nd wife was cheating on him. His 1st wife had also cheated on him. I made sure I pointed that out to him one day...I said, you even had a friend that killed himself over the pain..don't you realize what you've caused?

SO, sad, my heart breaks for everyone involved.

My dear friend's brother cheated on his wife, she divorced him and he committed suicide. The BW is destroyed.

So, so sad

That is just horrible; I cannot begin to imagine what his family is going through, much less how his WW feels.

Thank God I failed at my attempt...it just breaks my heart to hear about things like this.

This is a very real biproduct of infidelity. I've witnessed this twice over the years with folks I've come across in my travels.

And the par that truly angers me is that the WS gets off scott free, and in many cases lacks the empathy to truly "GET IT" regarding the pain that they have inflicted. Of course, you could argue that if they did get it, and have empathy, they wouldnt stray in the first place.

Unfortunately, these stories are more common than people think.

My mother’s second husband…..his mother killed herself due to his father’s infidelities and other mental abuse issues. She left behind 5 small children.

The father went on to marry and be an abusive POS to the second wife. I guess he didn’t learn much.

My mother tried to kill herself twice during the divorce from the second husband…..he was cheating on her.

Infidelity is UGLY.

My uncle suddenly committed suicide last January...for apparently "no reason" I always strongly suspected infidelity on either his part or my aunts. He did not leave a note.

Been there tried that. Obviously failed. Just like I did with everything else in our M according to my FWW (for the first year).

The only reason I didn't kill myself is because I was pregnant. I still almost did. I was in the garage with the boxcutter and she kicked and I just decided I could wait a few weeks, it wasn't fair to kill us both.

I'm so glad my mental state cleared up before she was born. I was going to kill myself in the hospital.

I was so close it was scary. I had my plan worked out, was figuring how to get away from FWW long enough to get what I needed. I was also working out a way that neither of my kids could possibly find me.

Close family friend (I work with) and FWW figured it out together & FWW took me to the hospital.

I'm glad now that they foiled my attempt. At the time BigDS was not-yet-2 and LittleDS was a newborn.

I almost did it twice. First time, I started the truck and sat in the garage waiting. Then thought of my little dogs just on the other side of the door and was afraid they would die too. The second time I went out in the back yard in the middle of the night with a loaded Glock. I don't know what kept me from doing it. Sometimes I still wish I had. This is a living hell.

I can relate.

[This message edited by Holly-Isis at 1:41 AM, December 18th (Saturday)]

Fortunately, if someone is making my life unbearable, I tend more towards murder than suicide. Just couldn't work out how to get to everyone on the list in the time I figured I would have.

I did have an incident shortly after dday on an isolated icy highway where everything seems to run in slow motion. I eventually hit some pavement so I could stop, but I thought for sure I might die there. Strange thing was, I didn't care one way or the other.

Yup. The first months were rough. I picked a date to do it and got myself help. Somehow assigning a date to do it helped. The mean reds creep up on me every so often but I am learning not to listen. IC has helped.

I wasn't going to post. But I feel like I should. I know depression and the pain from the affairs and life in general is hard. My friend that just committed suicide has fought depression for years. The next time one of you gets the urge, I want you to stop for just a second and think if you can, that you have a friend that loves you IRL, and that friend then is going to have to carry around the pain and guilt of not being enough or getting there faster, of feeling like if maybe they had said this or done this, they could have prevented it. It's horrible is all I can tell you, I have never felt anything like this. If I didn't have the support from my friends IRL and my friends here at SI, and my faith, I think I would have had to be committed for awhile. 15 minutes, I was 15 minutes late. When the pain gets that overwhelming to you please remember there is someone that loves you that wants to help. I hope that no one ever has to feel the way I've felt the past 2 days. I've actually went almost 3hrs without crying today. So far my record. The pain does eventually fade. Please reach out.

Dont forget to include the people who put the bottle to their heads, or slowly kill themselves with drugs over the years from relationships shattered by infidelity.

[This message edited by Finallyatpeace at 7:35 PM, December 17th (Friday)]

Ashamed to say I tried twice, once with pills and once in the garage with my motorcycles running. Can't imagine what would have happened to my kids. The depths of the depression that results from infidelity can't even be understood unless you've been there. Somebody was watching over me then and I am thankful for that. It is a very real consequence of the utmost selfish act.

ds

I have often thought about it... but never really planned it or given it any serious room in my head.

My Mom put a loaded gun to her head when my step-dad was cheating on her, but she called and got help.

My Grandmother succeeded, she was 78 and was sick of the abuse she'd been receiving at the hands of my grandfather for YEARS.

I don't know why I've never really done it, could be I know it's not the answer, could be that I know my DS would be devastated, could be I'm just as much a failure at this, as other aspects of my life.

Who knows, but I'm still here and now, 1 year out, I don't think about it anymore and I'm getting stronger every day.