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I was talking to a friend of mine and she was talking about the importance on BJ’s. Personally I don’t give them and the way I feel about them will never change. I also don’t expect to recieve oral sex in return, it just doesn’t really do it for at all. I also grew up in a culture where blowjobs were only for prostitutes because they are easy to give in a car without much work from the guy getting them, they are quick, and no emotional connection. There is also the thought that I kiss my kids with the same mouth. I can’t shake that thought. I wanted to get an idea of....

1. How much women enjoy giving them

2. How many women actually give them

3. How many men love them

4. How many men consider them deal breakers

5. Do you think it’s impersonal

Any other comments on oral sex.

[This message edited by CWBS83 at 9:06 PM, November 17th (Friday)]

My ex was really bad at them (lots of teeth and such things), so I didn't really enjoy them. I've never really had a good one. The thought turns me on, but it reality, I've always preferred other things.

I do enjoy giving oral, though.

I am mostly "meh" about oral sex in general. I was never excited to perform it on a woman but did because it was somehow expected. I was never excited to get a hummer, but didn't turn one down because that kind of rejection never gets let go.

i am a pro at receiving blowjobs.

When I love my guy and my heart is in it, giving oral is great. When I am pissed at him or hurt, I can no longer give. Hate it.

It's a very active, giving gesture, and it gives me no personal satisfaction without the joy of pleasing the person I love. A stranger? Super gross.

I do love receiving, but I expect him to feel the same way--loving me brings his desire. Without it, he would probably pass. Idk.

It's a part of making love in my world, but it's not really a part of having sex.

Bj's have always been very important to my husband. I don't mind giving them but if he still isn't finished after about 15 minutes, I get really annoyed. One time he lasted 45 minutes and kept saying he was close and I starting thinking about biting it. Kidding. Mostly.

carebearstare - 😂😂😂

I like to give and receive. I only like to do it because he likes it so much. He prefers to finish another way though. Since I otherwise don't really enjoy it, I include things

Chocolate syrup or whip cream so I get something out of it. I'm surprised you don't like to receive, maybe he isn't very good at it? Ouch. am so glad this is an anonymous site!

I do agree that it is highly personal and only with my H....only with someone I love or I would think

it is gross.

NTV haha. You never disappoint

[This message edited by Jesusismyanchor at 10:33 PM, November 17th (Friday)]

I actually enjoy it. But that is with my H. I don't just do that for everyone. I really do like it though. I consider it more personal, so yeah. Not passing out BJ's like Halloween candy.

Need I say more ?

[This message edited by Dorothy123 at 10:49 PM, November 17th (Friday)]

They are now a trigger for me. As far as I know, my husband has not had actual intercourse with another woman (though I think he was working up to that). He has flirted, been on highly inappropriate online sites, has had emotional affairs, sexted at least one of them, and received a BJ from a restaurant employee. Because of that, I have probably only given him oral about twice since in the almost two years since I found out who he really was. I can't really do it without thinking about the way I was betrayed. It hurts too much. In fact, even hearing about BJs is a trigger. As far as I'm concerned, any kind of sexual contact is very personal.

Before I was betrayed by all his actions, I was open to almost anything sexually (as long as it was just between us) and rarely turned him down when he wanted sex. It didn't matter if I was tired from dealing with young kids or wasn't in the mood. I loved him and wanted to be a good wife to the most important person to me.

Now I'm bitter and more reserved. I don't turn him down for normal sex that often, but it's not what it was. I know what I mean to him now and that my efforts to be sexually available to him were unappreciated.

Yes I give them almost every time we have sex and yes I enjoy it. I mentally put myself in his place and think about what I would like. Seems to work rather well.

Yes I love to receive as well. Really love it. So thinking of him going down on her is the most common mind movie I have and one of the most painful.

What has two thumbs and loves getting blowjobs? This guy!

Seriously though, WW has always loved giving them and prides herself on her work. That of course became part of the problem. I've always argued that oral sex is sex, otherwise it wouldn't include the word "sex". She used to insist it wasn't. I'm sure that was because giving them to other men was easier to do if it wasn't sex. Then she could convince herself she wasn't really cheating as she went down on them.

Personally I've dated women who would perform the act, but not too completion. Absolutely not a deal breaker. I also have always enjoyed giving a woman oral. The more she gets turned on by it, the more I do too. However, since d-day I haven't done it anymore. She's kind of hinted around about it a bit but hasn't ever pressed me on it. If she ever does outright ask I'll tell her the honest truth: I don't do it anymore because I can never again be sure no one else has been down there before me in some manner, or have any way of knowing what they might've left behind. I may be crazy, but I'm not stupid.

1. I enjoy giving them, but I'm not going to lie- I love receiving oral more. I receive way more than I give these days- but on days when I'm feeling him I'm equal opportunity. It feels good to give pleasure.

2. Yes, I give. Also, maybe I'm weird here but balls are freaking fun. I get why they play with them so much!

3. Generally it's foreplay for us and then we finish the job with sex, but I went the 'full blow' the other day- I think it's safe to say he loved it.

4. Personally, if a guy refused to go down on me I don't think I'd stay with him. That'd be a major ego-killer for me. Mind you, esp. on this board people stay for much worse than that and I've never experienced in my marriage or previous relationships/experiences a man who hated peaches, so to speak.

5. Impersonal? Your mouth is on the privates! That's pretty freaking personal. If they look at your vag your butthole is right there! Butt sweat and hair!

Yeah, oral for me has always been integral in sex. A good third of the time we don't even go further. Half, even.

Malibu that thought is the worst for me too. H is amazing at oral, toe curling. Imagining that part which no doubt existed is the hardest, especially since I was his only partner before her.

The pain of knowing my fWH went down on two ONS's is so much mental suffering for me I don't know if I can ever recover. The absolute grossness of him going down on a D.I.P. (disease infested pussy) has literally made me vomit. Him giving Oral sex has been almost harder for me to forgive than any other aspect of his ONS's.

I've had a hard time understanding why that has been the focus of my pain and mind movies?

We are both fairly adventurous these days, and have always enjoyed oral, and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

am so glad this is an anonymous site!

Not quite anonymous enough for me! I just don't talk about this stuff on forums.

NTV

My ex was really bad at them (lots of teeth and such things), so I didn't really enjoy them. I've never really had a good one. The thought turns me on.

I do enjoy giving oral, though.

If I can change the word ex to current WW, that's me.

[This message edited by Wool94 at 7:33 AM, November 18th (Saturday)]