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MidnightRun ( member #59434) posted at 9:06 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Concerning the bedroom, I'm sure she, too, will never again feel comfortable there.
Sanibelredfish ( member #56748) posted at 9:08 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Hope floats are you referring to POS’s BW?
Cromer ( member #62867) posted at 9:09 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
While I have no sympathy for your STBXWW it sucks knowing some poor unsuspecting woman is going to have her world blown apart in just a little bit
.
She blew her own world apart. Literally.
[This message edited by Cromer at 3:10 PM, April 13th (Friday)]
Me: BH 55 Her: WW 57 DDx2, DS. D-Day 1: May 17 2017 D-Day 2: Mar 18 2018 ONSx1; Boss 6 Mos; Trainer 6 Mos Cheated on while deployed, last A 11 yrs before D Married 30 years, divorced Oct 17, 2017. They are mine.
MidnightRun ( member #59434) posted at 9:13 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
LtC, she'll probably start blowing up your phone soon.
[This message edited by MidnightRun at 3:15 PM, April 13th (Friday)]
HopeFloats2272 ( member #39264) posted at 9:15 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Cromer
I should have specified that I meant the OBS.
BS- 40, WH 38Married 13yrs, 2 Sweet Boys-9 & 13DD#1: 1/10/12- 6mo EADD#2: 8/23/12-1PA, 2ONS in 2010 and 1EA/PA in 2004DD#3: 9/10/12- ONS w/friend in 2010Lots of other crap and TT Divorcing....finally.
Cromer ( member #62867) posted at 9:18 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Cromer
I should have specified that I meant the OBS.
Right, of course. Yes, that does suck so bad, and with children. Cheaters and the damage they cause. Nothing nice to say about them so just say...nothing.
Me: BH 55 Her: WW 57 DDx2, DS. D-Day 1: May 17 2017 D-Day 2: Mar 18 2018 ONSx1; Boss 6 Mos; Trainer 6 Mos Cheated on while deployed, last A 11 yrs before D Married 30 years, divorced Oct 17, 2017. They are mine.
TimelessLoss ( member #55295) posted at 9:56 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Two observations about you:
1. You have deep personal, professional, and collegial relationships with people.
2. You can be the adversary from hell.
Both have served you well in this shit storm. You have been righteous in your actions, never straying from the high ground of your core values.
Make it your mission to heal. You successfully compartmentalized all of this shit while deployed. Incredible resolve and discipline that. Now find the way to operate w/o stuffing down your feelings.
I have a concern for you about what might be in the material extracted from the computer. Steel yourself if you do the review.
"You've got to learn to leave the table when love is no longer being served"
PricklePatch ( member #34041) posted at 10:00 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Balboa Park amazing, So much to do so little time.
I am sorry your having to deal with her parents. I am glad however despite her horrible behavior that your telling them the truth and they can be her emotional support.
Put your phone on silent. Or turn it off. Definitely keep find my phone off if she has any access to it.
LtCdrLost (original poster member #63398) posted at 11:20 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
That was probably the shittiest thing I've ever had to do. My STBXW's parents are both old line Old Dominion Folk. Sons & Daughters of the American Revolution. A family pew in the local Episcopal Church with a brass plate dated over 200 years ago. And I just put their hearts on the ground right next to mine, FIL teared up hard and I had to play a CD of them having sex in our bedroom to convince her Mother it was a "real affair". MIL is driving to her daughter now. My phone is blown up with voicemails which I don't intend to listen to and at latest count 11 text messages...
[This message edited by LtCdrLost at 11:47 PM, April 16th (Monday)]
Formerly banned as Hiram, a fraud and liar.
OrdinaryDude ( member #55676) posted at 11:25 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
So she’s been served then?
I was young and dumb and stayed with a cheater.
ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 11:25 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Sending hugs and strength. When you're going through hell, keep going.
You are so strong for not letting your whore wife play you for a fool. Be prepared for more of her shenanigans, and stay NC. That is your fastest way to heal from this.
Well played sir.
Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now
LtCdrLost (original poster member #63398) posted at 11:26 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
My PI visited POS's wife at their home as I drove to the in-laws and left a very incriminating package of evidence with her. Photos & audio CD's mostly, and a timeline going back to the Saturday after Thanksgiving. They actually found time to rendezvous on both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, and them with young kids in the house. That should go over big, nicht wahr? The only portion of all this where I have no current intel is the situation with the POS. I need to be 100% hands off on that, my career is in the balance if I do anything which could be construed as interference.
Formerly banned as Hiram, a fraud and liar.
MidnightRun ( member #59434) posted at 11:26 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
I knew the phone barrage was coming.
Smart move tucking it away.
LtCdrLost (original poster member #63398) posted at 11:28 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
So she’s been served then?
Yes. In the lobby of her office at 1610 EST. Boom. The party is most definitely over.
Formerly banned as Hiram, a fraud and liar.
SCARLETT94 ( member #52566) posted at 11:28 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
I'm sorry you had to do that
"Don't look back, you're not going that way" Ragnar Lothbrok
Bazinga! TBBT
Sassenach... Jamie Fraser
imagoodwitch ( member #23375) posted at 11:32 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
We all need to be on the look out for the OM’s newly minted BS.
LCL, how are you doing? Emotionally?
[This message edited by imagoodwitch at 5:32 PM, April 13th (Friday)]
Ordinary average everyday sane psycho super goddess
RockstarDad ( member #62075) posted at 11:34 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
You did the right thing, take solace in that.
Do you have a plan to talk to her or are you intending on minimal/no contact for kids/divorce?
What was on the CD.
I gave her 7 years of everything I had. I will not give her one day more.
Me BH 36 Her WW 33 OM 27
She moved in two days later with the OM directly across the street... Divorced. Onward!
LtCdrLost (original poster member #63398) posted at 11:35 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
how are you doing? Emotionally?
Thank you for asking. Probably as well as can be expected. The worst part so far was being in what used to be our home. The bedroom especially, I thought I'd vomit. (I didn't) I'm meeting a few old friends at a really great steakhouse later then getting a hotel room for tonight. I just need to decompress now.
[This message edited by LtCdrLost at 5:37 PM, April 13th (Friday)]
Formerly banned as Hiram, a fraud and liar.
hopeandhealing ( member #63089) posted at 11:36 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
I am sorry you had to experience today.
Your words really struck me when you said telling her parents was the shittiest thing you have ever had to do, that their hearts were on the ground with yours. The pain was palpable to me and I am very sorry. That pain created is not yours to own, your WW put you all there.
May you find peace and happiness in time from this awfulness.
[This message edited by hopeandhealing at 5:43 PM, April 13th (Friday)]
Me- BW (45)
Him - WH (46)
M - 22 yrs, DC (20,17)
DDay - Aug 2017, 4 LT PA
MidnightRun ( member #59434) posted at 11:40 PM on Friday, April 13th, 2018
Don't worry about om; his ass is in a sling--on the homefront, and in his career.
Nice job.
[This message edited by MidnightRun at 5:43 PM, April 13th (Friday)]
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