SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Loukas, how can you possibly argue with Incarnate and I that any apple is better than this one??

DragnHeart not all Dick pics are bad.

Elle, perfectly said I think....I am not in the mindset to say a much younger man either. I guess that varies. I would also be looking for companionship so again I see how the motivation matters.

For the record, I don’t buy the biology bit. Otherwise I wouldn’t get hit on so much...although I believe I am still very capable of having kids at 43 or so my body tells me. That is also a socially skewed fact.

This much I know to be a fact: The Gala apple is the best apple known to man

^^^Totally agree. Fiji's are pretty righteous too.

I can't get down with Red Delicious. I always wondered why they have no taste yet are so popular. Then I read this:

“In the 1950s, as Red Delicious was developing, there was a major shift in the way Americans bought food,” Beck says. “Previously, people would buy food right from the farm or at farmers markets until the advent of good refrigeration and the grocery store chains. So people started buying with their eyes. The Red Delicious, without a doubt, is a pretty apple. It’s gorgeous and very inviting, but it’s kind of like you think you’re buying a Corvette, and then you get into a Chevette.”

“The strive for a better retail presentation led orchardists and nurserymen to try to design and crossbreed that Red Delicious to get that perfect dark red color and those perfect five little bumps on the bottom,” says Paul Vander Heide, owner of Vander Mill Cider. “And in the process, they forgot that things have got to taste good.”

Third, younger women will put up with more of your shit. Maybe they're feeling that ticking clock and really want kids (I've known women who put up with a monumental amount of bullshit for this very reason) and so they're less inclined to next your ass. Maybe they're charmed by your "worldliness" or whatever and think your whole spiel is enriching to them. Whatever's at play, a guy might be able to get away with more selfish behavior. There's a plethora of people out there who are only calcifying as they age, becoming "set in their ways", and the subset of people who aren't fans of this version of you but will roll with the punches anyway diminishes in time. Relationships are the Great Compromise. Either you're one of the naive lucky ones who thinks it's all about "finding your right person" (lucky you, out of 3.5 billion partners, you happened to have found your Only One, tell us your damn secret already! THE PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW!), or you've been through the ringer and realize it's about compromise and sacrifice. It seems like the older we get, the less we're open to said compromise and sacrifice, so maybe it's easier to just find a bigger pushover.

Abandoned guy - I agreed heartily with your entire post. I just pasted this to quote part of it.

I also think that sometimes there are lots of ramifications with that younger woman that appear later.

My brother in law married a woman who was just a bit older than his oldest child (this was eons ago) He married her. Now he is of retirement age, has a child in kindergarten, and can't retire because he can't afford the lifestyle the woman wants. But, the woman in many ways is justified - she is in her mid thirties, of course she wanted her own child, of course she wanted to go for her dream house, etc. She should not have to sacrifice her experiences in life because he already had them. And in turn, he really shouldn't have to sacrifice his retirement and what he worked his whole life to do. These are the kinds of predicaments people get themselves into when you are 25 years older than your S.O.

Anyway, I think you said everything I was thinking but didn't know how to say. I don't think it's that much about biology (other than maybe sexual attraction) and more about wanting the easy happy path.

Hmmmmm ya ok that dick pic is ok. Next time I'll be more specific and say PENIS pics...

Well say what you will be I prefer the texture AND taste of a red D. Guess my tastes just arent as sophisticated lol. Then again if I'm going to snack on fruit its not going to be an apple. I prefer citrus and melons.

Ellie, you come up with the greatest memes!

Yeah, justsomelady, I would be one of those friends who would probably think your family is too much in each other's business. But, hey, if you like it, you do you.

our parents have a huge impact and involvement in our lives forever.

I'm trying not to be insulted by this, but I feel a little bit so. My parents have had a huge impact on my life. My mom is dead, so no involvement there anymore. When she was alive, she was very involved. She wasn't the greatest mo, but she was the best grandma.

My dad is still alive and still very much a part of my life. He recently got sick and lived with me for about 9 months. He is now living with my stepsister because he doesn't want to impose on us. We have both told him he could never be an imposition. He will be coming back to my house in April, I think. He wants to split his time between the 2 of us girls. I love him dearly. He is the first person I call when i need to talk or i need advice. He was the first person I called when i found put my H had been cheating. I can't imagine my life without him.

All of that being said, neither of them have or had any power over me as an adult. They can certainly give me their opinions, as all my family can. I appreciate it when they do. They can't tell me how to live my life. I make my own choices about my own life based on what I want, not what anyone else thinks, including my family.

You don't have to be all up in someone's butt all the time to being meaningful and impactful in their lives. That's what healthy boundaries are about.

Granny Smith apples are the best. I am older than my WH, his AP was young enough to be my daughter.

Ellie, I was preparing myself to argue your, dragn and steady’s claims. Even started preparing a rather large diatribe. Until it occurred to me, SI premium comes with an incredible feature, an ignore button!

Never used it before, never seen a need. Until last night! And now that Incarnate has jumped in attacking Macintosh’s, unaware that he is the presence of the ‘89 and ‘90 Georgian Triangle Largest Macintosh Champ! Well, there are no words!

Team Gala is building our camp! Coco, Kingrat, good to have you here!

To the rest of you, you know nothing!

I have never been sent a dick pick but I guess I have now!

It's the same with cougars...low self esteem and preditory. Grandma believes shes gonna teach "sonney" a thing or two. The boys believe and get off on that idea...same dynamic...he has mommy issues...pretty gross, when you think about it. Lmao!

Ok like wow. This is a little judgemental....So yep. This granny (which I only have a 13 year old son) was in my late 40s and dated a man in his late 20s - 20 year age difference. He had no mommy issues and we dated for 7 months. We were both surprised how easy and drama free it was. It was my fault it ended.

My XWS had an affair with someone much younger and I wanted to try it. Call it gross, but heck - he was 6’2, had a 6 pac and his personality was awesome. He is a jet pilot. It was never meant to be serious, but we were both surprised about how fun it was and I don’t regret it at all.

Maybe we just do things differently in CA 😆😂

Oh and I am not a cougar, but I do find younger men attractive. My boyfriend now is 3 years older then I am.

[This message edited by CaliforniaNative at 7:02 PM, February 6th (Thursday)]

And now that Incarnate has jumped in attacking Macintosh’s, unaware that he is the presence of the ‘89 and ‘90 Georgian Triangle Largest Macintosh Champ! Well, there are no words!

fite me irl

bro do u even lift bro

I will die on this hill.

I will die on this hill.

Pretty sure you died on that potato mound, bru!

Fight fight fight!!

*throws apples

The french called potatoes Pomme de Terre, which translates to Ground Apple.

This fight is that fight, and it ain't over. You can keep your grody sweet potato posers and match them with your chalky garbage apples.

Poser-tatoes and Macintrash.

Poser-tatoes... Omg

I am deaded!

Fwiw, i think it ties back into fart tolerance. Older women want to come off as mature and sophisticated and other shit (nobody cares that you haves sneezed in four years because sneezes are childish). That kinda attitude is the antithesis of philosophies like MFtF (male freedom to fart).

if there isn't a group in your area and you're interested in getting involved l, then let me know. I have pamphlets.

Well considering I am one of the French, and knowing that potatoes are the apple of the earth, I’m a little insulted by your cultural appropriation of our language! That said, I’m assuming Ellie is throwing around honeycrisps since that’s all they’re good for! However, you sir, I bite my thumb at you!

[This message edited by Loukas at 12:21 AM, February 7th (Friday)]

Gala apples for eating. Granny Smiths for pie.

Coco - I was explaining a cultural and familial (and I guess also personal) difference - not insulting you - that is great you are close with yours. You have your boundaries with family and I have mine. I would be uncomfortable w a stepparent my age, you aren’t, whatever. I wanted to explain why my thinking is what it is and had no intention of insulting. My explanation of my family’s closeness does not negate that in yours or whatever yours means to you. I am just saying there is a difference and it doesn’t mean my feelings are invalid or wrong about the step issue and power dynamic. It is a personal difference and there is a cultural difference at play in my dynamics as well.

If anything - you are the one insulting me telling me my boundaries stink. I don’t really care -We have different definitions of healthy. Where it counts they know I do and have done what I want and deal with it/pound sand if not. But the parental stuff doesn’t evaporate, the dynamic - changed and evolved with adult kids - continues. Beyond the parental power dynamic, I don’t really have an issue with most age gaps. I’d be miserable in the situation you describe (step peer) and you’d be miserable in my culture/family situation. Different strokes etc. If you think our boundaries suck - you just don’t get it and that is ok.

Anyway. The more relevant Apple issue - I am one of the red delicious lovers. I feel a little weird now about that, knowing their history described above. They can be mealy but if you get a good one they rock.

[This message edited by Justsomelady at 2:55 AM, February 7th (Friday)]