SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

WhatsRight.....

😎👍👍

@WhatsRIght you really are such an amazing and awesome woman. You and your husband will be in my thoughts. ❤️❤️❤️ Good night dear lady!

Prayers to you WhatsRight.

Your H has the gift of an angel being in his life. 😇🙏

[This message edited by The1stWife at 5:18 AM, October 18th (Sunday)]

Y’all are too kind!

But I will certainly share with him what you said!!!

Ooh, but I forgot to mention hummus! You have to have hummus. Carry on.

Omg I am IN love with hummas...!!!!

Ok the avocado hummas not so much but garlic hummas is my snack of snacks. A plate of green beans, broccoli, cauliflower and carrots and I'm in heaven. Even better with triscuit crackers. Hummas is the perfect for dipping.

I've made my own but....first problem is I only have a mini blender....so like a cups worth at a time. And I haven't been able to find Tahini in any stores.

If you can have an affair with food I am so there lol.

Affairs aren’t all bad.

Has anybody had the dark chocolate hummus? I hate all things hummus, but my WH loves it.

OMG! HouseofPlane what a great flashback. Family Affair was indeed a good affair. Brian Keith, Cathy Garver, John Whitaker, Anissa Jones and the incomparable Sebastian Cabot. So sad we lost Anissa Jones at such an early age due to an overdose of dark chocolate hummus.

I think "for better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and health" covers a lot of situations regarding honouring your vows.

I will try to add to your list 36years.....Oh, I got nothing.

Leaving an abusive relationship.

There was a movie a couple of years past about an older man who visits his wife daily at a nursing home. She’s suffering from dementia or Alzheimer’s and has lost all understanding of her world. The man clearly loves his wife of many years and brings her flowers, reads for her, shows her pictures and all that. She on the other hand is in love with another man at the home. If I remember correctly, he was more-or-less comatose.

To me that movie displayed true love. He was at her side no matter what.

Was she in an affair? Well… I think the key to the WS accountability is the DECISSION to cheat despite knowing it’s wrong. The old woman wasn’t capable of deciding, at least not while understanding her decisions.

Like if I walked into the wrong hotel room into a dark room and crawled into bed and started fiddling with the woman, I assumed was my wife then in my books it’s not infidelity until I realize it’s not her. If I do but carry on its infidelity. The KEY IMHO is that I know and understand it’s wrong but probably justify it with some lame excuse.

Is that lame excuse a good excuse or reason? No. Never.

Abusive relationship? Leave it. Start afresh. But don’t reply to abuse with abuse.

...an overdose of dark chocolate hummus.

*spews coffee on iPad*

Wow, I didn’t know...thank you internet.

Is it a dish best served cold?

Has anybody had the dark chocolate hummus?

I'm not a fan of dark chocolate and I've never seen chocolate hummus but I'll keep my eye out for it now just to give it a try.

Yes, Bigger.

It was “Away From Her” with Julie Christie and Gordon Pincent.

The thing is, the man his wife fell in love with wasn't comatose. He was mentally diminished somehow...I’m assuming with Alzheimer’s- I think it was an Alzheimer’s facility. He was very dependent on her and they did develop an infatuation for each other.

I can’t remember if they had a sexual relationship, but I do remember their spouses did. The spouses without Alzheimer’s.

The other man’s wife took him out of the facility because of her H’s infatuation. But eventually, the woman’s H did bring him back to see his wife. Out of love for her.

Sad, sad, sad movie.

I personally wouldn’t categorize the behavior of the ill man and woman as adultery, but I’m not sure I give the healthy spouses the same pass.

Not sure whether this thread is serious or not; but a friend's friend (so take it for what it's worth, 2nd hand info). Her husband's physically abusive, not all the time mind you, here and there - I'm guessing when the pressure gets to him. I guess CNN would call it "a mostly peaceful marriage". She can't leave. Psychologically unable to. Codependent, probably a host of other reasons. Had a short-lived affair at work (guy she slept with was an asshole too apparently, guess her choice of men isn't too surprising). She's still with her husband, obviously hasn't told him.

Acceptable? Understandable? Is she a victim or an abuser?

Personally I wanted to call the cops; but there's not much to do. She, as far as my friend explained, won't cooperate and unless we can call them while he's hitting her then they can't do anything.

(to those wondering, subject came up discussing my affair - and yea, I'm not under any illusion that I was anything other than abusive).

Not sure whether this thread is serious or not

It was meant to be serious when it started, but sometimes people who have been so burned by the flames of infidelity need to have the salve of humor applied to lessen the pain.

This is one time I don't mind having my thread hijacked. In fact, I am enjoying it.

But still want to read some serious thoughts.

In my opinion she’s a victim and a wayward.

Depending on her psychological issues I guess.

Don’t want to be judge and jury here.

Leaving an abusive relationship

I don't consider this an acceptable or understandable reason for committing adultery. Leave the relationship. End it. Then, go find "love" elsewhere.

Will do a new compile listing in the future. If you disagree with any, please say so and I will add which ones are in contention.

Just throwing it out there, but what about an arranged marriage where one party is not interested at all in the relationship? Would that give cause for that party to seek love elsewhere?

Just throwing it out there, but what about an arranged marriage where one party is not interested at all in the relationship? Would that give cause for that party to seek love elsewhere?

Great question. Twenty years ago, I had a friend from India who was in an arranged marriage. BY the time we met, he and his wife had been married for about 10 years. She walked behind him, never in front. She was fairly quiet. When asked about the marriage and whether or not they were in love, she told me love comes in time. They are still married.

I think cheating in the situation is infidelity.

However, I think child brides, forced into a marriage, have been forced into an abominable situation.