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Honey, they always affair down

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sadeyes2011 posted 1/9/2011 14:03 PM

THANK YOU! i needed that! I know that i am a successful woman who went to college, works at a university and just was asked if i wanted a promotion. OW is in a basically non-existent job, has no future, has 3 kids herself (we have one and one on the way) WH constantly told me that he felt sorry for her, etc. I felt exactly what you wrote but with it being so fresh it is hard to get complete peace and understanding, so this helped so much! I know i am better than her and she was someone who would listen to him and take all of his bad parts and ignore them for her own selfish satisfaction. OW was looking for someone to give her the self esteem as her husband just left her, because she was not a good wife, etc.


letmego posted 1/13/2011 11:42 AM


Spilledmilk posted 1/13/2011 11:53 AM


The OW in my case is such a scumbag. She has no job anymore after losing her fast food cashier gig. I'd be surprised if she actually graduated from high school, judging from her literacy level. She has two kids under 4 with two different guys, neither of which she was in a relationship with at the time of conceptions. She dumps those kids off on anyone who will take them, and is hated by many a former babysitter for not paying for their care. Her home is dirty inside and out. She is known around town as being a skank and has been investigated several times for mistreating her kids. Her face is squinched-looking and ugly, her eyes are beady, and her ears are like Dumbo's. I am told that her vagina smells like bad cheese, although obviously, I don't care to verify that one.

She is two years younger than me, though. LOL.

[This message edited by Spilledmilk at 11:54 AM, January 13th (Thursday)]

prariegirl posted 1/13/2011 12:37 PM

Thank you for this. I really needed to hear that!

EveryPurpose posted 1/13/2011 14:14 PM

I read this early on after my Dday and I look at it time to time. Thanks for keeping it going. It kept me going in the early days.
They do always affair down. Early on it isn't easy to see this because you think there is something wrong with you but that could not be further from the truth!

his_loss posted 1/13/2011 16:57 PM

Spilledmilk, I think you described the OW in our situation. Except yours had a job.

hurttothebone posted 1/13/2011 19:48 PM

I am very new here. Saw this topic mentioned in a few other posts. So I hunted it down. Now I am glad I did. The OW in my case is a "recovering" Crack head. She went to rehab, because he didn't want to be with a crack head, it's ok if she does pills, booze or pot, but no crack. In his words, at least they have something in common. He is a pill head and now she is too. Ever seen a crack head? It ain't pretty.
D-Day 1-10-11
together 7 years, married 5. Pain daily

[This message edited by hurttothebone at 7:51 PM, January 13th (Thursday)]

gunnisonbrown posted 1/13/2011 20:52 PM

I SO wish there was a OW forum on SI. The the OW needs to see how she is perceived by everyone else, even our WH's!!

Bump! Bump! Bump!!

SadSpouse posted 1/13/2011 22:35 PM

WOW, I really did need this tonight.

She is skinny and blond....I'll never be a blond. Not even close.

She IS older than me though.

And she is just a piece of shit.

shocknraw posted 1/14/2011 00:34 AM

I just copied and pasted this in an email to my WH. It is completely true about the OW. Thank you.

Spilledmilk posted 1/14/2011 09:00 AM

I SO wish there was a OW forum on SI. The the OW needs to see how she is perceived by everyone else, even our WH's!!

Don't worry- they lurk here. They know. There are other forums for OWs- I started reading them after DDay to get an idea of what type of person I was dealing with. I actually found them comforting- these women (there didn't seem to be many men there) are messed-up, period. Not happy, sexy vamps- sad, lonely, pathetic, desperate women. Really- the OP hit it out of the park with this post- it's totally accurate.

Seriously- Are we allowed to post pictures? That would be fun, huh?!

I'm guessing we're not, or someone would've done it already.... am I right?

'Cause if we can post pictures, I think it would make this thread super-funny and I'd be happy to go first!!! (How 'bout it, mod(s)?)

hurttothebone posted 1/15/2011 15:44 PM

I have come here and read this a few times. So I wanted to bump it for some of the newbies.

LuckyCat posted 1/15/2011 16:05 PM

On top of being unattractive, the OW is a bisexual, alcoholic, gold digger. She has no morals and formulated a plan to take her husband for his money, then leave him to raise her children with my WSO. Secretly, he found the suggestion appalling and profoundly f*ed up. He considered her mentally unstable and trashy. While he may not have disagreed with her ideas outright, choosing to laugh them off, I know my WSO well enough to trust him when he says he had no interest in raising her children by other men. Particularly not in the manner she was describing. According to my WSO, she actually points while they were intimate. He volunteered this detail recently. I didn't ask and never expected to hear such a thing. He practically whispered it, he was so embarrassed. He said it was her general body odor, and not limited to private parts. Nice. He always hated the way she dressed. She had absolutely zero style. He found her socially embarrassing. She was pretentious and crass. The way she talked about herself around friends and strangers made him wince and want to hide.

I, too, wish we could post pictures...comparison photos! But, Christ, I think we would be libel or something.

I do hope the OWs lurk and get an eyeful of reality. What our WS thought afterward, but how they also perceived them all along.

[This message edited by LuckyCat at 4:08 PM, January 15th (Saturday)]

beyondpain6107 posted 1/16/2011 18:42 PM

in EVERY case I know this is true.

OW who is now his wife, looks like a man. Everyone thinks she is a lesbian, and a manly one at that. She had 4 affairs in her first marriage.

There are other things about her, but I don't have enough time to list it all

Goes to show affairs are NOT about the BS

SisterMilkshake posted 1/18/2011 10:47 AM


hurttothebone posted 1/18/2011 15:58 PM

Bump. Newbies need this.

AIHAH posted 1/18/2011 16:03 PM

This is my favorite. If you can't laugh today at it, then you will in the future...

girlsbird posted 1/18/2011 17:05 PM

As a newbie I want to Thank You for this. and oh baby did he ever "Affair Down" This "IT" (her nickname in my home) is so low she needs a step ladder to kiss the belly of a snake!

Hit_By_A_Hammer posted 1/18/2011 18:32 PM

that was fascinating. When I first found out (by looking at her facebook page - nice!) I was bemused. She came across as shallow and boring, and judging by the photos she chose to put up on her profile, a fat, pug-faced troll.

Not that I'm saying I'd rather he'd chosen supermodels with Oxbridge PhDs, but that?! I wouldn't have cleaned the floor with her.

hurttothebone posted 1/20/2011 20:36 PM

Newbies need this. I know I still read it often. Thanks for the post. BUMP BUMP BUMP

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