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EllieKMAS posted 10/3/2019 19:20 PM

Taking nothing from the former and recovering waywards on this site (seriously, you guys are awesome), I am constantly just shocked anew at the Stupid Shit Cheaters Say.
Just thought we could start a collection. You know... for science.

Mine: (to me, about his 18 yo AP) "I want you to get to know her. You would like her - she is so wise beyond her years."

Also mine: (leaving the courthouse after filing our D) "I know none of this has been easy, but thank you."

So spill it. What did your WS say that just made you shake your head in disbelief?

[This message edited by EllieKMAS at 7:20 PM, October 3rd (Thursday)]

WhoTheBleep posted 10/3/2019 19:54 PM

"I want my life back."

(As in, I had just found out about his double life. He wanted the life where he got to do whatever he wanted with other women and I knew nothing about it. I was the attractive successful wife and mother of his three kids at home. We all made him look good. It sucked for him that now I knew who he really was. He hated that. The exposure.)

outofsorts posted 10/3/2019 20:02 PM

When asked why he cheated on me - approx. 10 hand jobs at "massage parlors" and sex with a prostitute over a six month period:

"I don't know."

totallydumb posted 10/3/2019 21:07 PM

When I confronted XSO about her affair, she of course denied it.

After I told her that I personally witnessed her getting naked with her AP through the window that was open in OUR BEDROOM, she said:

"We are just friends"

I calmly asked if she fucked all her friends, as I walked out the door.

GoldenR posted 10/3/2019 22:14 PM

He/She is just a friend.

Vomitousmass posted 10/3/2019 23:17 PM

for science.

That would be weird science, correct?

This is a mixed bag, but on my EA dday, after my wife and I had talked about our relationship and her AP's place in it, she said that I just needed to talk to him. Then she invited his whole family, minus his WW who was cheating on him, to our house that evening.

This all happened 2 days after she claimed I had shredded her body. I was so shell shocked at the time I didn't respond. After years of reflection, I finally agree with her. I knew those guitar lessons would pay off.

The1stWife posted 10/4/2019 05:03 AM

Stupid things cheaters say. Okay here goes:

1. CH: “If I (me the BS) met her I would like her.” My response was that I try to keep friends who want to cheat with my H to a minimum.

2. CH: “she doesn’t want to be the OW”. My response was that she should stop dating married men. This was him trying to show me she was a “good person”.

3. CH: “I’ve been unhappy for years.” Hmmm funny how he became “so unhappy” when he met the OW and chose an affair. Now he claims he wasn’t “unhappy”. Can he make up his mind?

4. CH: “You don’t love me”. Hmmmmmm how to respond as I know that was said to justify his excuses for the Affair. Let’s just continue to blame the BS for all of it.

These are just a few. Hope they provide a good laugh because they are so ridiculous but my CH actually said them. And I did respond exactly as written. I just wish I had added a hand gesture along with my response.

[This message edited by The1stWife at 5:05 AM, October 4th (Friday)]

Emotionalhell posted 10/4/2019 06:31 AM

WH “I told you my relationship with her didn’t affect us.”

I recently ask if he was ok with the lies he told me to cover the affair. His answer was yes........ so why lie if you really thought the affair didn’t affect us 🙄

“I will never understand why you told OBS... I about had the situation wrapped up... I was trying to calm her down.”

My first cheating H...... said....” I will never find another woman half as good as you.”

ETA: XWh #1 if you’d see what she looked like you would understand. ( former meth user that needed dentures)
Also “ you would like her”

[This message edited by Emotionalhell at 6:34 AM, October 4th (Friday)]

cocoplus5nuts posted 10/4/2019 06:45 AM

She's helping with our M issues.

I thought we would all be friends.

Tentwinkletoes posted 10/4/2019 07:39 AM

But I never stopped being a good husband to you. I was still fully invested in us 😂😂😂😂 yep that one I got even before he had told ow to GTF

Hallmack posted 10/4/2019 07:46 AM

I never stopped loving you during the affair.

99lawdog99 posted 10/4/2019 07:50 AM

My WW after I found out talking to her niece:

" I can't believe he wants a divorce!"

J707 posted 10/4/2019 08:37 AM

You never loved me.

We just met.

I've been unhappy for a year.

I've been unhappy for two years.

You don't like the color of my eyes (Haha, I'm all like, wtf?)

I never meant to hurt you.

This is all your fault.

There was no affair. I'm not a cheater.

You're crazy and delusional. Stop making things up in your head.

Atleast AP loves me and makes me feel loved.

(A few days after Dday) I've already met his parents.

You fuel my depression

I used to be a good mom and wife, you sucked the life out of me

You were just sucking at being a friend and husband (I replied: Was this before or after you were sucking APs dick?)

We weren't a family towards the end (you know, when she wasn't around screwing prince wonderful)

Wow, when I write these out I'm so glad I divorced this evil woman. I'll add more later.

nothisfriend posted 10/4/2019 08:38 AM

After I asked to see his phone and conversations with OW:

You should also realize that while OW is dear to me, she is not the crux, the reason, nor the source of our problems. OW is a friend, a business partner, and married. If you and I dissolved today, OW and I would not have a relationship beyond its current scope. I did not leave you for OW, and she is in no way responsible (nor the reason) for the current situation. In fact, I didn't leave you. You ejected me, in winter with no money or transportation.

Yeah, they are married now and the love story of the century in their little crowd.

Marie2792 posted 10/4/2019 08:45 AM

My husband told me that the first time he was screwing OW, he thought to himself “what the f#%$@ am I doing, this isn’t my wife.” Yeah buddy so you went back 8 more times with “not my wife.”

OneInTheSame posted 10/4/2019 09:14 AM

“I was never going to leave you.”

Ah-h-h, except for the three dozen or so times you lied about where you were so you could be with her, eh?

sisoon posted 10/4/2019 09:28 AM

My W told me she gave ow a 'sort of engagement ring,' because, you know, same-sex M wasn't legal in our state at the time. She couldn't explain how she could be M to me and engaged to someone else at the same time....

She reported this to me after d-day, so this is really stupid shit WSes think while in the A.

[This message edited by sisoon at 9:30 AM, October 4th (Friday)]

DevastatedDee posted 10/4/2019 09:30 AM

"The prostitutes pressured me into sex. I didn't want to."

Lemondrop10 posted 10/4/2019 10:04 AM

I've got all kinds of these since my XH was a serial cheater:

"I thought about you the whole time."

"We talked about YOU most of the time."

"I just wanted to talk but they always expect sex and then I don't know what to do." (How about leave or say no or hell, not hang around women if you seriously can't handle yourself?)

"I couldn't even perform. It must be because I love you that much" This was in regards to him not being able to get it up a few times (which I confirmed with those APs but who the hell knows if it was really true) Either way, maybe that could be a hint that it was wrong, not a challenge to take your impotence all over the state to multiple people like it was some kind of challenge to overcome.

"Why are you destroying our family?"

EllieKMAS posted 10/4/2019 10:04 AM

OMG see? I'm dyin laughin over here

I thought of a couple more...

When I asked to see his phone on DDay1 so I could see exactly wtf was going on (a phone I bought on a plan I paid for btw): "You shouldn't read it. I don't want you to hate me and it will just upset you." (I told him I was already upset and if he didn't hand it over I'd cancel it before kicking him out of the house).

And because of my telling him that he needed to leave for a while because I couldn't move on if I was still taking care of his pathetic ass: "You kicked me out and made me homeless. That wasn't fair of you to do and I didn't deserve that." WTAF. NO.... I think you lived in MY house by my grace, and sticking your dick into a teenager in it, yeah getting kicked the fuck out is kind of a natural consequence of that stupid choice, you unbelievable douchecanoe...

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