Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Asterisk

New Beginnings :
Time for another T M I question thread....

This Topic is Archived
default

ADryHeat ( member #46484) posted at 2:42 AM on Saturday, March 17th, 2018

I think there’s a vast difference between using sex as a manipulation/control tactic and enjoying giving pleasure to a partner. I never view sexual acts as a ‘favor’ to my partner, but I do enjoy doing things because it makes my partner feel good. Let us not conflate a healthy desire for pleasure and a love of making our partner feel good with manipulation. I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how many times I’ve heard men agonize over the difficulty of making women orgasm and the pride they feel when they are able to make that happen. I don’t think that’s a bad thing as long as the reason we are trying to give pleasure if for our partner’s enjoyment AND for our mutual enjoyment.

Me: BSMarried 11 years, 2 young kidsDDay 11/3/14, Discovered he was still a fuckwit: 7/10/15 DIVORCED 11/12/2015"Sometimes when you're in a dark place you think you've been buried, but actually you've been planted."

posts: 2396   ·   registered: Jan. 24th, 2015   ·   location: AZ
id 8117521
default

Want2BHappyAgain ( member #45088) posted at 5:33 AM on Saturday, March 17th, 2018

She loved to give them attention as well

who is "them"?????

I LIKE your descriptive style !!!

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6673   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8117576
default

Lawyerman ( member #61021) posted at 9:53 PM on Saturday, March 17th, 2018

His balls I expect. Them guys.

posts: 919   ·   registered: Oct. 12th, 2017
id 8117909
default

Lawyerman ( member #61021) posted at 9:59 PM on Saturday, March 17th, 2018

Well my STBXWW finally gave me a good BJ last night. We had been watching a movie and she had been checking my dick everytime there was a sexy lady on screen (as she does) so she could make sure that wasn't turning me on (DIVORCE!!!!!). Anyway, we are parting but still have the odd moment (every time I swear it will be the last). But there is still a huge amount of physical attraction. So anyway, she is fiddling about with it and gets excited and I say she needs to finish what she started and she actually gave me the blow job I had always wanted. Soft and caring, not trying to suck my balls out through my cock. I was about 75% of the way there and then she broke down ans said I would meet someone else and she would never see me again. This is a pattern. I think it's abusive.

Bye.

posts: 919   ·   registered: Oct. 12th, 2017
id 8117911
default

LilBlackCat ( member #57470) posted at 11:29 PM on Saturday, March 17th, 2018

His balls I expect. Them guys.

Want2BHappyAgain, what he said above..

Me: BS 43 (Now 50)
Her: WW 37
18 M, 19 Together
4 Children, youngest is now 9.

Divorce Final as of 9/3/19.

posts: 1247   ·   registered: Feb. 17th, 2017   ·   location: San Diego
id 8117963
default

Want2BHappyAgain ( member #45088) posted at 12:52 AM on Sunday, March 18th, 2018

Thanks for the clarification . When you started talking about the fish out of water part...I was wondering if the nipples got tweaked or what !!!

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6673   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8118007
default

JustDone ( member #9742) posted at 6:35 PM on Sunday, March 18th, 2018

What a thread!

Lawyerman,

We had been watching a movie and she had been checking my dick everytime there was a sexy lady on screen (as she does) so she could make sure that wasn't turning me on (DIVORCE!!!!!).

Are you saying she checks you during movies to see if any other woman turns you on, and if they do, she will divorce you?

Does she do this anywhere else??

Sorry, I can't tell if you are joking or not.

Madhatter
Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.

posts: 3058   ·   registered: Feb. 12th, 2006
id 8118350
default

GoingCrazyNow ( member #59520) posted at 8:02 PM on Sunday, March 18th, 2018

Ok, so I got my BJ Saturday around noon before we went out for St.Pattys Day. I was sitting on the couch and she comes into the room, kneels on the floor in front of me, and puts her head in my lap. After about 5 minutes of this I mentioned how she was at the perfect height to do the tube snake boogie. As I stood up, unzipped, she started going to town. After 5 minutes I was getting close, but not quite there so I grabbed her head and face f’d her for a good 5-10 minutes -She was gagging for a bit and slobbering all over the place, so it built up, and I blew my top. Was awesome - even better was she didn’t waste a drop! Down the hatch! A definite swallower!

posts: 220   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2017   ·   location: Shit Sandwiches Inc.
id 8118401
default

Greeneyesbluezy ( member #58158) posted at 10:55 PM on Sunday, March 18th, 2018

GCN,

That sounds utterly disgusting and abusive.

Stop right there, I already don't give a fuck.

posts: 1248   ·   registered: Apr. 5th, 2017
id 8118487
default

GoingCrazyNow ( member #59520) posted at 11:36 PM on Sunday, March 18th, 2018

Abusive? Not at all. She was fine with it and liked it. Sheesh....

posts: 220   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2017   ·   location: Shit Sandwiches Inc.
id 8118497
default

Notfromhere ( member #56006) posted at 11:53 PM on Sunday, March 18th, 2018

It didn’t sound great to me either. Hopefully it was less unpleasant than it reads.

Me: 40. Brit living in the US. SAHM to a feisty 5 year old.
Him: 46. Mid life crisis? Suspected infidelity but I now think he probably didn't cheat.
I suspected infidelity, but he swears not and now I don't know. It really doesn't mat

posts: 115   ·   registered: Nov. 12th, 2016
id 8118503
default

Want2BHappyAgain ( member #45088) posted at 2:07 AM on Monday, March 19th, 2018

GoingCrazyNow...it sounded kind of HOT to me . I am assuming...when you wrote that you grabbed her and face fucked her...you were NOT FORCING her...correct? I mean...she could have STOPPED it at ANY time...right?

If she didn't...sounds like she LIKED it that way . What was her reaction AFTER if I may ask?

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 6673   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8118579
default

funnelcakes ( member #45249) posted at 7:02 AM on Monday, March 19th, 2018

Only in NB can girl in these hallowed purple halls hope to graduate from the mindfuck that brought her here to a facefuck.

May the Good Lord bless this bus and its riders, and may I ride it eternally to glory.

d-day in August of 2014, when I was SAHM 34 weeks pregnant with kid #3
A year of incontinent alcoholic cheater word salad and shitweasely blameshifting during R/S
I got a job and busted a move with three kids to a 1BR apt
D final 4/27/17.

posts: 1168   ·   registered: Oct. 15th, 2014
id 8118697
default

ADryHeat ( member #46484) posted at 7:38 AM on Monday, March 19th, 2018

::looks around::

::looks at her cider to be sure it wasn’t spiked::

::puts down cider::

Y’all are rapidly making free online porn feel obsolete.

Me: BSMarried 11 years, 2 young kidsDDay 11/3/14, Discovered he was still a fuckwit: 7/10/15 DIVORCED 11/12/2015"Sometimes when you're in a dark place you think you've been buried, but actually you've been planted."

posts: 2396   ·   registered: Jan. 24th, 2015   ·   location: AZ
id 8118703
default

yougogirl ( member #11332) posted at 2:02 AM on Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

Ooooh, great thread!!

XWH insulted me one time by saying that he "could stick his dick in a bucket of warm water" in regards to me giving a BJ, so I've had BJ anxiety since then.

However, my post-marriage ONSes (and one 2NS, lol) seemed to enjoy it.

Me = doormat BS, early 50s
Him = Narcissistic XWH, same age
Married 25 years, known 28 years, HAPPILY divorced
One DD (18) and 2 pets
Separated 12/15/14, divorced 11/2016

posts: 2414   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2006   ·   location: East Coast
id 8119370
default

silverhopes ( member #32753) posted at 1:51 PM on Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

Edited: Sorry, not appropriate for this thread.

[This message edited by silverhopes at 6:09 PM, March 23rd (Friday)]

Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.

posts: 5270   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 8119579
default

ADryHeat ( member #46484) posted at 5:37 PM on Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

Silverhopes, I sort of want to answer your question, but I’m struck by how you describe your H. It sounds like he has (perhaps unintentionally, but still!) put some insecurities in your head that are complicating your ability to be honest and open with him. IMO, the best sex happens with people who can be totally unguarded and honest. If your dynamic is such that you feel ‘less than’ or like you’re just seeking his approval because you worry you can’t compare to others, the issue IMO is less about getting him off and more about why you should try so hard. I’m trying to say this very gently and kindly and without assumptions about your H, but the trust required for experimentation (and the focus on comfort and pleasure for you BOTH) needs to be part of the process of figuring this out. In other words, while certain positions or techniques may help in terms of pure physics, to me it seems like a more complex issue.

Me: BSMarried 11 years, 2 young kidsDDay 11/3/14, Discovered he was still a fuckwit: 7/10/15 DIVORCED 11/12/2015"Sometimes when you're in a dark place you think you've been buried, but actually you've been planted."

posts: 2396   ·   registered: Jan. 24th, 2015   ·   location: AZ
id 8119757
default

Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 5:51 PM on Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

May the Good Lord bless this bus and its riders, and may I ride it eternally to glory

Shiny and chrome

BH
DDAY Mar 2014
Widowed 2022 - breast cancer

posts: 13534   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2014   ·   location: Washington State
id 8119768
default

6M$Man ( member #8344) posted at 5:55 PM on Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

What a lovely day. What a lovely day.

I am trying to live a life I can respect myself for. Finally.

posts: 2003   ·   registered: Sep. 27th, 2005   ·   location: Iowa
id 8119774
default

Loukas ( member #47354) posted at 5:57 PM on Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

Shiny and chrome

...so I read this and I get a mental image - FC spray painting her mouth chrome as she leaps off the bus, yelling out “WITNESS ME” in her ‘graduation’ to the facefuck.

posts: 1862   ·   registered: Mar. 29th, 2015   ·   location: The school of hard knocks
id 8119775
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy