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allatsea (original poster member #38923) posted at 12:07 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
Simple,
Thanks for your post. I am doing all of those things. I'm professional and well presented. I'll make sure to reign in my anger!
NIK
A friend of mine let it slip that she'd changed her name. She is blocked and I cannot see her profile or posts.
5454
Thanks for the reasssurance.
I've just received a proforma invoice from my solicitor for the hearing and all the preparation. Over £3000. CSTBXWW will have a similar bill, I imagine.
I texted CSTBXWW and said "Before I pay this are you of a mind to settle beforehand"
She replied "Only if you agree to everything I want" 
It's what I expected but she's utterly confident that she's going to win.
I've now paid the solicitor
You can't fix crazy. All you can do is document it
Abbondad ( member #37898) posted at 1:44 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
She replied "Only if you agree to everything I want"
Wow. Definitely send this to your attorney to be used against her. Clearly you are being reasonable, and she is, well...not. Threatening and extortion overtones, IMO.
Divorced April Fool's Day 2014
Fear is the mind-killer.Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.I will face my fear.I will permit it to pass over me and through me.-Dune
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 2:36 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
I swear you and AD are married to the same psycho. I just don't know how she gets back and forth across the pond so fast!!!
Hang in there, the end is nigh.
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
allatsea (original poster member #38923) posted at 2:48 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
By coincidence Abb and I were discussing the very same thing only a few moments ago.
Cut from very similar cloth, it seems.
Mine is crazier than yours.
No, mine is crazier than yours
You can't fix crazy. All you can do is document it
woundedwidow ( member #36869) posted at 3:37 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
They say eberyone has a doppelganger - your STBX and Abbondad's must be each other's!
Be careful what you wish for the most - you may get it.
k94ever ( member #11176) posted at 6:27 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
Make sure you send a copy of the text to your lawyer. He/she can use this in court.
k9
BS:61
WS: 53
Betrayed: 24 years
Affairs: 15 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.
mountainmomma ( member #34388) posted at 10:51 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014
AAS
Just wanted to comment on this
She replied "Only if you agree to everything I want"
It's what I expected but she's utterly confident that she's going to win.
I challenge her confidence there, perhaps it's because she so UNCONFIDENT she's going to get everything she wants that she's trying this crap on with you. WS do use a lot of bluster and false confidence, they rely on us to "believe" their confidence and "fear" it, hoping you will give her what she wants. She's relying on you there to believe that.
Not long now and remember we are all rooting for you and behind you. As tricky as it might be this weekend with your boys with Monday getting nearer, enjoy your time with them and use it to do your best in court on Monday. Will we know you can do.
And NO MORE TEXTING THE LOONY!. Starve her of those ego kibbles.
In light
MM
Me 37
WS 42 (Mitty)
4 kiddys 9,7,4 &20 mths no5 due August 14
seeing hookers, NSA sites, escorts, anyone willing from 07/08 (i didn't know)left to do full time with no restraints 2010 Returned home march 2011 in R DDay 2.4.2010 OW 30+ age 18-60
allatsea (original poster member #38923) posted at 10:26 AM on Friday, March 14th, 2014
This weekend is going to be brimmed with activities for the boys.
There will be zero communication with CSTBXWW.
I can't wait to get this over with although the nerves are building.
You can't fix crazy. All you can do is document it
Swims ( member #30992) posted at 2:52 AM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
Strength to you today, Allatsea. I hope you had a wonderful weekend with your boys....keep that close to your heart. You will prevail!!!
Swims ( member #30992) posted at 2:55 AM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
Double post
[This message edited by Swims at 9:01 PM, March 16th (Sunday)]
sinsof thefather ( member #29295) posted at 8:14 AM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
aas, I'm absent from SI for family reasons right now, but please know that you and your boys are in my thoughts today and that I'm adding my name to all who will all be there in that court room supporting you in spirit. I hope the judge sees you for the great Dad you are.
...second star to the right and straight on till morning.
badd ( member #23468) posted at 11:21 AM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
good Luck AAS you and your boys are in our thoughts and prayers today. 
betrayedfriend ( member #19785) posted at 1:17 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
I know you're likely already in court, but just wanted to let you know I'm praying for you and your kiddos today. You've fought fair and honestly, I hope your judge sees it and your barrister goes for stbx's jugular.
I originally joined SI as a way to help my best friends find ways of coping with infidelity, but now infidelity has touched my family much closer to home.
h0peless ( member #36697) posted at 2:48 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
mountainmomma ( member #34388) posted at 3:06 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
All the best for you today
In many people's thoughts
MM
Me 37
WS 42 (Mitty)
4 kiddys 9,7,4 &20 mths no5 due August 14
seeing hookers, NSA sites, escorts, anyone willing from 07/08 (i didn't know)left to do full time with no restraints 2010 Returned home march 2011 in R DDay 2.4.2010 OW 30+ age 18-60
5454real ( member #37455) posted at 3:24 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle
JessicaFL127 ( member #26864) posted at 3:58 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
BW,35
divorced for 10 years
Happily remarried to a much better choice.:D
mom to two awesome boys,14 and 13
And now to a beautiful baby girl, 1 <3
"But you said your vows, and you closed the door
On so many men who would have loved you
lostcovenants ( member #40637) posted at 4:01 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
I've been following your story since my own D-day but this is the first time I've commented. I've learned a lot from you about honesty and integrity. Thank you for sharing so much of your personal struggles with us. May you find justice today. May your children know how you have fought for them - many would have given up when the battle was so long and hard. Best wishes - you are a great Dad.
DDs, 1977 (prostitutes), 7/8/13 (LTA MOW), 11/14 (CL), 9/1/15 (PA).
Porn, 2DUIs, blame-shifting. I told both families & adult kids. I was suicidal and cutting.
I moved out for 2 years, he asked me to come home 10/16. R w exit plan.
STD discovered
hexed ( member #19258) posted at 4:16 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
thinking about you today AAS
But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned
“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler
feelingfoolish ( member #22804) posted at 4:29 PM on Monday, March 17th, 2014
Thinking of you and your boys today. Hoping all went well in court.
Multiple ddays-LTA with coworker.
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