SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

What a great society were building then. Let's all use and abuse each other to get ahead. Let's make selfishness the base on which we build our world.

When you trace back any of the major problems of our world, it goes back to selfishness.

That time is coming, we need to choose. Be selfish, be angry and get what I deserve, sex, money, power, whatever, or be understanding and compassionate, sharing. Me me me will eventually crash eveything. Our relationships, our world.

Anger doesn't solve anything except to signal something needs to change. These red pill guys aren't heroes, they are just helping to make the world a crappier place to be, teaching others to be crappy so they can feel good about it to themselves.

I got treated bad. Doesn't mean I want to go out and use and hurt people. That's never good for anyone and it's destructive for society.

The time is coming fast when we have to choose. We can't go on as we were. Places like this are leading the way to humanity's solutions.

I think you should be strong, you should be fit, you should protect yourself. Use your anger to push you to positive changes. Others will admire you, will follow you. Go be a leader. We need leaders. But don't be angry to use, to destroy, to consume. You feel in control but in reality all you are doing is throwing out the best part of your humanity, all you are in the end is an empty shell. Your youth and physical ability gone, all that's left is a creep who used and knows it.

I wish you strength and plenty of sex, whatever makes you happy. Get that anger out of the drivers seat, if you feel like you want to express it, it would feel good to express it, you can find a healthy way to do so, a way that doesn't compromise your humanity. Be strong and don't follow fools.

[This message edited by pureheartkit at 1:08 PM, January 31st (Wednesday)]

Yes, I agree. However, I did find one or two threads on the Red Pill reddit in which a self proclaimed Red Pill Male confessed that he'd been rejected by multiple girls in a given night, even despite working out, becoming less beta, etc. People in the comments section actually thanked him for his honest, humorously written post because it showed that there's no guaranteed "recipe" for picking up girls, that rejections and bad nights happen even to the best Red Pill Males.

No matter how good you are, or how amazing your red pill knowledge is, the fact of the matter, as any decent pick up artist will tell you, it's a numbers game. Most women are going to say no. Even if your impossibly handsome, rich, and have a reputation for being fantastic in bed, most women are going to say no. But it only takes one to get your laid, and a lot of RP stuff is about getting comfortable with the rejection so that you can push forward and keep trying.

I learned this stuff at a young age, long before the "red pill" was a thing. And it worked shockingly well, I went from not being able to get a date to having a few girls I could call for some fun at any time. But, the thing that gets glossed over, I probably had to approach 50 girls to sleep with 1.

Relating this back to the reason we're all here, that's one of the things that has to be hard for both sexes about an A; how many "approaches" did the AP have to make? How many women did he proposition at the office before one said yes? It's hard for me because I can't believe my W was so foolish, but it has to be even harder for his wife because it could have been anyone who said "yes"; my W was not the first (she'd caught him before), but how many "attempted A's" did he have and fail to get off the ground?

What a great society were building then. Let's all use and abuse each other to get ahead. Let's make selfishness the base on which we build our world.

Sad, isn't it? I guess it was always kind of this way, but, yes, that's pretty much exactly the world that we've built.

I don't think that anyone can ignore that many women are attracted to strong, confident, leadership men.

When my FWW and I met that is what she said was attractive about me.

In my working life I continued to be. As a husband and father I always deferred to her.

I became beta at home.

When the children left home I think that I no longer was as attractive to my Fww.

She would disagree with this but she chose an AP that was a complete user and narcissist.

He was a very confident POS.

My role as a beta paycheck was no longer that important.

She wanted an earlier version of sam59 not the 33yr marriage version.

That's interesting because this is spoken of quite a bit by Red Pill types. Women want Alpha "Thunderdicks" in their 20's and a Beta Provider in their 30's when their SMV declines (their words not mine).

There is also an interesting post about how women try to "Beta-fy" their husband like in your situation...

Women know, on some subconscious level, that male attractiveness is about your mojo, or your overall attitude. If your girl destroys your self-esteem once a week, you'll never have enough mojo to even think about getting another woman. Then you're hers to drain of resources. Eventually, the relationship may end, but it will be on her terms -- the way she likes it.

The grand irony of this whole thing is that, in acting to secure her mate's long-term commitment by lowering his value, she becomes no longer interested in him as a mate. This didn't used to be a problem, because she'd only have to look at the destitute women to see what happens if she's tempted to leave. Now, however, thanks to alimony and no-fault divorce, when she's thoroughly betafied her man, she just leaves him and takes his money.

Thought provoking...

Yeah. Super thought provoking.

So, in their subconscious core, women are fucking terrified of not having a mate to provide for them. This fear has been bred into them as a Darwinian fitness mechanism.

Or, I guess we could use the frontal lobe we've developed to accept the thoughts and emotions that we get from our "emotional core" and choose to do better despite them. We could do that.

There is some good information related the the whole red pill thing. Very little, but there is some. Sure, work out, connect with your masculinity, I do these things.

The other ninety-five percent is just an instructional on how to emotionally abuse women to get your needs met. If that's the life that you want, go for it.

Me, I am unconvinced that there isn't a partner out there for me that will treat me with some respect, and can live a happy life parallel to mine. Probably pie-in-the-sky.

Women want Alpha "Thunderdicks" in their 20's

Oh, puh-leeze, the generalizations about women are vomit inducing.

I’m a believer that being dominant at the right times is a good thing. As it’s been mentioned, life is situational. Going around and ALWAYS being complacent and Passive is a weak trait, and not desirable. But going around and ALWAYS being the loudest most aggressive guy in the room is equally offputting. It’s a question of When and where to know how to play your cards.

In the case of in the case of infidelity, and disrespect in general, honestly I believe in taking no prisoners, and my actions have reflected that is a core trait in my personality. It has served me well in many ways, but at times hurt me too. So when I have been disrespected in the past, Ive made sure I get the final say. So I’m thsi regard, asserting control and dominance over a WS and an OP feels cathartic, and frankly it did.

BUT that doesn’t mean I need to go around and demand selfish blood from every human I encounter. That’s sociopathic IMO, and makes people generally dislike you. I have always followed through with treating people how they treat me, and it works. I believe in being good to others who are good as well. I’d give jenshirt off my back and help anyone of the people who I am close to, or do right by me. But the counter is tiebas well. It’s a mistake to cross me because I will come back looking for blood. Idk. To each their own.

And for the record, the idea of “game” is nonsense. Any horny hihhschool boy figures out its a numbers game, and to just be comfortable in your own shoes. Trying to attain a mythical level of “game” may yield short term results, but not substantial long term love. To me, A woman who betrays me isn’t worth anything beyond a few emotionless romps and a kick to the curb, but I refuse to believe that about ALL women. If I did, who would I learn to love and grow old with?

Be confident, take no ones shit, treat others as they treat you, and always try to do right by the people you love, and the people who deserve it. That’s what i see as being a real man.

To me, A woman who betrays me isn’t worth anything beyond a few emotionless romps and a kick to the curb, but I refuse to believe that about ALL women. If I did, who would I learn to love and grow old with?

Be confident, take no ones shit, treat others as they treat you, and always try to do right by the people you love, and the people who deserve it. That’s what i see as being a real man.

Word.

Not letting others disrespect you....

I don't get that - I don't see how anyone can force another to respect anyone or anything....

I'm curious about this: where do RP and MGTOW men place their mothers in their worldviews?

Where do the men acted by Gary Cooper (Sgt. York, High Noon, Lives of Bengal Lancers, etc.) fit in the RP/BP worldviews? Coop's characters do not aim to dominate. They just aim to do a right thing when forced to choose.

[This message edited by sisoon at 12:15 PM, January 31st (Wednesday)]

Both ends of the spectrum are wrong, period end of discussion. When you group any sort of people (gender, sexuality, etc.) together and make mass assumptions about them you are just flat out wrong.

Why can't you just be a wiser version of your old self? You don't have to turn into an asshole actually.

The saddest thing about this is your ex is still controlling your life though she's long gone.

The saddest thing about this is your ex is still controlling your life though she's long gone.

In a sense, you are right. But, I don't think its sad. How else would I learn to avoid her type in the future and generalizing or not, she has a type. Next...

At the same time I'm improving myself to become more confident/assertive/dominant and value another for what was sorely lacking in my previous relationship. So far, so good.

Infidelity/Divorce was a zeroing out phase for me. In military drill sergeants break your civilian self down to build you back up into a soldier. Not much different with this. You don't need a shrink to learn from self-examination and to recallibrate your life accordingly.

Sisoon , by don’t let others disrespect you, I mean don’t let them get away with it unscathed. If a 7th grader gets picked on relentlessly and just sits there day in and day out being the “better person” they are going to continue to get bullied. And eventually they may implode (suicide) or explode (school shooting). That’s a potential consequence of letting others do you wrong and get away with it. Conversely, if that same kid one day walks up the bully full of anger and swings fists like babe Ruth, he will have a) vented his anger b) stood up for himself, c) taught the bully a lesson in humility he won’t forget.

I don’t see any harm in putting fear in those who disrespect us. It doesn’t make that 7th grader a bad person because he refuses to tolerate disrespect, it gives him confidence to know it wont happen again from that bully, and also if it happens from someone else, he will know how to handle it.

Idk- always seemed like common sense to me. People shouldn’t tolerate disrespect, and there are more than a few ways to ensure those who do try learn quickly to rethink who they decide to disrespect. Of course, that’s not for everybody, just my humble opinion.

Oh, puh-leeze, the generalizations about women are vomit inducing.

So you're saying that I SHOULDN'T ask to change my user name to Thunderdick1998?

Cool. More men telling women what they want.

(Gross.)

In my opinion there is a biological basis for women being attracted simultaneously to both “alpha” traits (which suggest good genes and physical safety for children) and “beta” traits (which suggest continued commitment and resources for raising the children).

A great tragedy in human happiness is that most men are not capable of shifting between “alpha” and “beta” as circumstances require.

In a simplistic archetypal sense, imagine the typical Vin Diesel movie character that is a badass with a heart of gold for the woman he loves. Now picture the same character but make him a badass but selfish. Or make him have that heart of gold but no spine. The single-lensed versions are much less compelling.

Thunderdick? My ass might make thunder but i never tried to get me dick to do it.

Are dick noises really worth pursuing? Maybe there's anew career path I was unaware of...

And for the record, the idea of “game” is nonsense. Any horny hihhschool boy figures out its a numbers game, and to just be comfortable in your own shoes. Trying to attain a mythical level of “game” may yield short term results, but not substantial long term love. To me, A woman who betrays me isn’t worth anything beyond a few emotionless romps and a kick to the curb, but I refuse to believe that about ALL women. If I did, who would I learn to love and grow old with?

Wow, we actually disagree, that's a first. :)

Game is not nonsense. Well, it's nonsense to spend a lot of time to learn it, but it isn't nonsense in that it is effective and it does greatly improve your chances of sleeping with a lot of women.

Learning this stuff is all about "short term results", it has nothing to do with a longer term relationship. At least it wasn't when I was reading/learning it, it was all about the "bang". But saying it's nonsense; I just can't agree with it, there are a ton of stories on here where male AP's "dropped game" on a WW and it went from "happy marriage" to blown up. Had that person not come along, and not known how to lie effectively to women to get them to drop their panties as fast as possible, the A never would have happened.

Rollo Tomassi, writer of the Rational Male, said it best that women should be a complement to a man...

Well shit, that explains everything! I've always been terrible at accessorizing.

So you're saying that I SHOULDN'T ask to change my user name to Thunderdick1998?

Literally made me LOL, xhz700. Thanks! (and then I had to explain it to my friend about why I was LOL)

I don't know about all this red pill bullshit but I do know this:

My ww's infidelity was never going to kill me, but my resentment and bitterness very well could have.

“Game” is nearly always bullshit because it is almost always based on lies. It generally involves creating an impression in the victim that is an outright or implied lie—the lie being tailored to the wants of the victim (commitment, money, whatever).

I know a small group of womanizers. They are handsome, make millions, drive Ferraris and other nice cars, are smart, charming: and despite these advantages they all feel the need to lie by omission or commission in the course of their seduction.

This board proves that there are women into casual sex—both betrayed and wayward. And I am sure that men get “lucky” with them. But men with a long and storied track record of seduction? Mostly liars, some of whom have the pretense to call their lies “game.”