I'm sorry, but this is one of THE most insane posts that I've read. You sound like someone that has never set foot in the "hood," trying to sell a movie script about it.
I have the scars to prove my time in the "hood". I've been jumped a few times, one time going on on a backboard. I'm happy you can walk safely through the hood, I cannot.
We're talking about the creepy guy behind the deli counter, the construction workers on the street, the well-dressed customer in a suit that keeps inviting you out for dinner and won't politely take no for an answer, the group of drunk frat guy/finance bros at a bar being obnoxious and making kissy faces at you and "accidentally" grazing your butt when you walk by.
And this is what we're lumping into the sexual assault category to get to "I'm assaulted every time I go to the grocery store" I assume? Except of the ass grabbing, not a single one of these rises above the level of "being an asshole".
So, for example, it would have been really cool if one of my male coworkers had stepped in to say, "buddy, she doesn't want to go out to dinner with you," and then taken over the transaction so I wouldn't be forced to smile awkwardly and come up with polite excuses as to why I was busy, sorry there's a not dsting customers policy, yada yada, while I was trapped on the other side of the desk.
Yeah, sure it would be cool. I might actually do something like that. But there's no onus of action here, it's not that you're being discriminated against or singled out. I'd NEVER step in to assist a man in those situations, creepy ex-GF bothering you Jeff? Well, handle your shit and blow her off hard. She'll get the point. And if it rises above that, call the cops. But being an asshole isn't criminal where inciting violence is. And me stepping in runs the very real chance of inciting violence where you blowing him off hard almost certainly will not. Why do I have the onus to act on your behalf if you will not, even if you acting is much more likely to result in a peaceful end to the solution.
And yes, while I'm being direct to make a point, if I was at the store waiting for my cold cuts and the guy behind the counter said something off color that was obviously inappropriate, I'd say something. But just because he's an asshole, and I'd let him know that. But I've been in a lot of deli lines and never seen this, where I hear in this thread it's an everyday occurrence for women. If I saw something like that, I'd do something yes, but I generally have pretty peaceful interactions in the deli line, no chance to be the "good guy" and explain to the deli manager why "nice ass" isn't an appropriate response to "I'd like a pound of American please".
What we're trying to say is that the "bad dudes" were referring to aren't always the "thug" looking guys with their pants hanging low. If anything, it's just as often the guy dressed in the business suit that "accidentally" falls into you on public transportation and acts like whoops! He has to grope your breasts in order to stand up.
I'd say something about this too. But I've never seen this happen either. What I HAVE seen is roving bands of thugs on the subway/trains, and let me tell you, I was as worried as you are. I actually remember once I was on a metro in Atlanta and there was a few "super-predators" in the car with us, harassing everyone, men, women, dogs.. Anyone they could intimidate they did. The guy next to me was also on his way home from work, and when we caught each other's eye he looked down into his bag and I could see the butt of his gun. I nodded my head and knew what he was telling me, if this gets bad, be ready and react (I was not carrying, but, if I was, I would have let him know). But nothing went beyond just "high grade asshole" stuff, and eventually the "super predators" decided they'd had enough and got off the train.
But this is a great example, they were intimidating the entire train car, acting the fool, cursing, and basically just terrorizing everyone. Once I knew this guy had a gun, sure, I could have gotten up and said, "sit the fuck down and shut up", which, of course, would have almost certainly caused a physical altercation and wound up with one/more people shot when the guy across from me started shooting. But would that have been the right move? Should I have "stepped up" and stopped them from terrorizing (verbally, not physically) the kids, mothers, fathers, grandmothers and everyone else? You might say yes, however CC law in my state says "no". It has to reach the level of physical danger and you're not allowed to intentionally escalate the conflict. And that's what it seems like people here are saying, it's my duty, as a man, to intentionally escalate the conflict when I see a women getting the once over from an asshole in a suit. Well, it's not, and, let me tell you, if I decide I'm going to do it anyway and it's as prevalent as I'm hearing here, it won't be long before I'm on the news as the perp or victim in an assault (best case) or gunshot case (worst case).