SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

My WS was a serial cheater, so I have more than my share...

"Is it OK to have one man for family and another for fun?"

"The AP talked about us being together and how easy it would be for him to snap your neck."

After I indicated that the "limited" elements of what she had admitted to amounted a PA -- "You mean that I could have sexually done more with the AP?" *said with regret*

"I didn't love you any less, I just loved my AP's too."

He cheated again because I was cold and not very attentive to him after the first series of affairs, instead I made him feel like a piece of crap. Apparently I was supposed to make HIM feel good about himself...

Oh Lemondrop, how unbelievably selfish!

I've had such a premonition (hasn't yet come true) and a (former) counselor once asked how much longer WH would put up with my anger and sadness.

I've had such a premonition (hasn't yet come true) and a (former) counselor once asked how much longer WH would put up with my anger and sadness.

Cassea, I'm glad you said that was a former counselor.

"The AP talked about us being together and how easy it would be for him to snap your neck."

I should be shocked, but after the emotional scarring I've been having the pasts months, it wouldn't mattered to me if that happened (to me). It would've saved me the pain I'm in now.

(Sorry, I should've not said that, anger and frustration are today's feelings for me. Trying to finish this day.)

When I got access to his email account and I found an email (only 2 days after D-Day when he swore it was just a 2 month long “friendship”) written to his skank and her bf (also a serial cheater as well) rewriting our entire marital history and saying that his BAW (bitch ass whore) had nothing to do with “this” (our alleged marital problems) and that they just “TALK” (when he’d already been having a full blown PA for 3 years that wasn’t hidden from anyone but ME).

I never knew that

“Tiny Pindick in Nasty Ass Cadaver Crotch with parking lot car sex dialect”

was a language he spoke so fluently.

[This message edited by LuvsMeLuvsMeNot at 8:03 PM, March 30th (Saturday)]

Just thought of another one. “I felt sorry for her bc OW was a single mother” to which I replied “the bitch was not a single mother she was a divorced serial cheating whore who was dumped and divorced by another previously divorced serial cheater who was divorced by his previous wife bc he cheated with your single mother serial cheating whore”!

“Single Mother” my ass!!

[This message edited by LuvsMeLuvsMeNot at 9:28 PM, March 30th (Saturday)]

“I’m just kind of selfish I guess.”

“But I bought you all of that David Yurman jewelry for Christmas!”

“How dare you go through my email!!”

“It wasn’t THAT many times.” (A THREE year affair.)

“I was afraid she would retaliate and report me to HR, so I had no choice.”

And another one out of his Whore Hole of a mouth:

When I was finally able to document that he blew at least $25,000 on himself and his Trailer Whore during their 5 year LTA and he said "$25,000 wasn't that much it's ONLY $5,000 a year and I spent more than $5,000 a year on you".

Hmmmmm DUMBASS, a little different story considering I'm YOUR wife!!

K, after reading some of this shit, Imma go back to my wife and apologize. "Honey, I'm sorry. You're a dumbfuck, but not nearly as bad as some out there." (uh-huh, right)

wow....sometimes it's comforting just to get it out and not keep it inside...

...few months after I found first text and when I confronted about the hotel....he just sat across from me on the bed and looked down, shrugged his shoulders and said yes, I slept with her...he couldn't even look me in the eye

...when questioning him about the receipt a few days later....he said she was late and waited for her at the hotel for two hours.. I asked did it ever cross your mind to leave and come home...his response 'I knew you were going to say that'

...after they did the deed...they promised each other it would never happen again.... I always knew this was a lie... Well 4 years later...he admitted (voluntarily...what a guy!) there there was a second time shortly after the first....so much for their promise to each other!!!!

BTW....A was over a year long....but they only did it twice..sorry...don't believe that one either.....

Strength and hugs to alll.....

On Dday #1, all I knew about was the massive number of texts that had been exchanged between my WH and McWhore (she’s the fast food of whores: cheap, easily available and convenient without any substantial value.) a few days later in response to my persistent questions as to what they could possibly have to talk so much about (she was supposedly just a friend at that point,) he yelled at me, “Because she listens to me and you don’t!!!! I’ve told you this and nothing ever changes!!” Yeah, right. Bullshit. We were in counseling for YEARS before and during his A’s and he may have mentioned it ONCE. Classic case of history revision. HE was the one that never changed his behaviors.

He called her “Baby” which is what he used to call me. Not anymore. He told me, “It’s actually short for Baby Girl” and “She asked me to call her that.” I call OUR daughter that (still do. I won’t let him take that from me) AND McWhore is a year older than our DD (McWhore was 24 at the time of the A, 30 years younger than us. Disgusting, right?)

McWhore called my WH “Daddy,” both during sex and sexting. Our daughter calls him that. Every time she does, I cringe. I can’t refer to my own Dad, whose been deceased for 30 years, by that anymore (whichbis what I called him) because of it. Now when I talk about my Dad I use his first name.

WH made a “date” with McWhore and said they’d have “dinner and dessert,” meaning sex afterward. That’s what he used to say to me. Supposedly, that date never happened because he bailed. He told me that he said things to her that came easily to him. I guess he didn’t have the creativity nor the desire to think of anything new to say to her. Needless to say, he no longer uses that phrase with me.

OW owed him money, and foolishly, I agreed that he didn’t have to send NC yet if he otherwise agreed not to contact her and to let me reply to any messages she sent to him.

About six weeks later, I had sent a few messages from his account asking for payment, and she eventually sent a payment, assured him that she still loved him, and then called him.

His face LIT UP while talking to her, and as I stood there and watched my husband talk to the bitch who’d been begging him to throw us under the bus/leave his family, he said, “How are you? I haven’t talked to you in a while!”

A while. You know - that space since DDay when my world had been shredded - when I felt like I was bleeding out - when I had been in indescribable pain - and he asked her how she was doing, as if it were nothing more than him being busy and he was absolutely delighted to hear from her.

I knew he had been missing her even though he’d denied it repeatedly, and couldn’t take it anymore. I told him I was done - either he went NC and forget the rest of the money she owed, or I was out.

He reluctantly agreed to go NC, but first wanted to wait a week to see if she’d send another payment (first pmt took five months...), and I said no, no more waiting.

So then he said, “Well, let’s wait until Monday or Tuesday because it’s Easter weekend and I don’t want to ruin that for her.” AYFKM? My Easter weekend was ruined by the two of them, but I’m supposed to be concerned about HERS?

Other things:

- I just wanted her for her body. // Guys like me don’t get girls like her.

- I work so hard for my family, and I told myself I deserved to have some fun, too.

- She’s a good person and a good friend.

- You won - not OW.

- Well, she’s a Christian. And she has a job.

- Sure I asked her to move here so we could live together, but I knew she wouldn’t so I wasn’t seriously thinking about moving out to be with her.

[This message edited by BlueIris at 11:07 AM, March 31st (Sunday)]

What amazes me the most was what was not said-how do you blow a guy at lunch and come home and act like normal? Go to church if it was Wednesday?

"I never set out to have an affair. I was just captivated by her eyes"

"I was surprised she reciprocated, because I was married"

"I've spent the last 25 years of my life with you, I'm just not sure if I want to spend the next 25 with you"

"Would you consider an open marriage?"

"Lots of wives allow their husband's to have mistresses"

To our eldest DS: "I was a virgin when I met your mother, so I wanted to try sex with someone new"

To our daughter who was 16 when she heard him call the OW his sweetheart on the phone while I was upstairs: "Parents separate all the time, you're practically an adult, you'll get over it"

" I love that tennis bracelet I gave you. Can I buy it from you?"

Top of the pops for me:

"We were spending too much time with the kids"... when he hardly saw them and made sure to be spend as much time as possible with the COW (out of the office). Throwing the blame to a 1 yr old, a 3 yrs old and a 5 yrs old for wanting to do something with their dad. That's low, fuck.

Oh, also "at least i was coming home". Merci. It must have been awful to be away from his beloved after work and be with the smuck who was boring him to death. Fear not, they were back to texting in the evening, about rubs and how much of a dick I was.

And when I said we will divorce, he told me he will get his 100k back (deposit on the house we just bought). Wasn't he nice? Our youngest was just 1 yrs old, and he wanted his money back. That's how much he cared to be with me and the kids.

-----> 5 yrs later: I'm off to France in 60 days with my kids (he gave me 100% custody because i caught him drink driving), and this prick wil be in foreclosure. We were spending too much time with the kids? Ok, now he will just be a paycheck. He can "try" to get his 100k back now, now that he won't he able to make mortgage payments and half the money from the house goes to me. High 5 to me. Hey, his mama told him his affair was silly and he will be okay. So I'm sure he will be okay. Might take him a while to get back to his feet, but that's not my problem.

Here are some of the things I had to hear from my wife:

"I don't respect you."

"I am not emotionally attached to you."

"I like to come and go as I please and do what I want."

"You and me together doesn't work for me anymore."

"I like having sex with him."

"I'm at the point where I want to tell you that I am having sex with 4 or 5 people just so you will move on."

"I was having my cake and eating it too."

"I don't want to be your wife."

"There is a level of depravity you wouldn't understand."

[This message edited by LightningCrashes at 1:10 PM, June 22nd (Saturday)]

Wow, it's amazing that someone who "loves/loved you" could say these things. It's no wonder a lot of us are left thinking our spouse became "a different person".

We ran into each other at the park that I didn't know she frequented, two days after DDay. She kept blowing me off and I was waiting for us to talk more, after she had had enough time to "think things over" ( ). She immediately puts on this superficially polite demeanor, like I'm some old coworker from years back who she hasn't seen in forever. Weird, patronizing smile. It's obviously awkward for me and *should be* for her, too. I'm fidgeting with my fingers and tiptoeing around the recent revelation that she's been playing me for a fool. She notices my hands, puts her hand supportively on my arm, and says:

"Don't be nervous."

In a helpful tone like your mother would say to you before your big recital or first holy communion or something. As if she were even remotely considering not leaving me--which she had already made up her mind to do. It was the demeanor and tone that she affected that really creeped me out. Complete disregard for what she had put me through, is putting me through, had done behind my back, all that. Like none of it really mattered.

K, after reading some of this shit, Imma go back to my wife and apologize. "Honey, I'm sorry. You're a dumbfuck, but not nearly as bad as some out there." (uh-huh, right)

Loved reading these! 😂🙄

A few of my favs from wh

‘I do this because you talked bad about my mom’

- I said I wished she’d taught him to use deodorant.

‘She’s not a whore’

- when the woman sending pics of her naked breasts was MOST DEFINITLY a whore

‘It wasn’t just about the sex’

- upon learning about his pa w a 20year old college student

Ugh.

"I didn't feel like you needed me anymore," said the caregiver to the chronically ill wife.