SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I can relate to this one in particular:

"I talked about you most of the time"

"I cheated because you rearrange the furniture too much and you don't ask me first".

No, this one wins the moronic trophy.

"Well you should feel better, YOU won".

Won? What have we won? Emotional pain? Sleepless nights? Insecurity? PTSD? Mental breakdowns?

*OW is still naked in our bed, he is standing with a blanket covering his naked crotch*

Him: You just don’t listen to me, I’ve been telling you for 6 months I don’t want to be with you!!!

Me: So, is that why you bought me a Best Wife Ever t-shirt last month?

Him: Bullshit, I didn’t do that! I’m really starting to think there is something wrong with you, I’m actually legitimately concerned you might be crazy. Seriously, you need to leave my room.

Me: You mean OUR room?

He left with OW and my stepDDs. I found that Best Wife Ever shirt when I was moving out and I nailed that mother fucker to the headboard!

Step DDs tell me he was LIVID when they got back and OW walked in to see that.

For the last 3 months of our relationship he actually made me question my sanity. I’m still questioning a lot of it now. Going through things in therapy and trying to figure out what was real and what wasn’t.

I think that’s the thing that really stings more than anything. He was always the one with self esteem issues, and I would try to help him through those. Towards the end he projected all of it on me, and now my self esteem is shot, largely because I can’t figure out how much of the last 7 years were lies. It’s crazy how you come out on the other side of this and all of a sudden you look back on your life as an alternate reality.

On dday, he screamed at me "You were a raaaaging bitch!" inches from my face while holding a bottled beer. This was approximately 2 minutes after him telling me, "Yes, I fucked her, I fucked her a lot." I have a lot of anxiety and PTSD from this encounter alone.

During the previous year and a half, I had done nothing but try to make him happy and tip-toed around our house. Many arguments started with him projecting onto me, "Why are you mad?" when I was NOT mad at all. I would look at him confused and say, "Will you stop telling me that I am mad all of the time when I am NOT?" I can't even count how many times he made me mad when I wasn't even mad to begin with!!!

I continued to pick up more slack around the house and dropped other hobbies/volunteer activities that I loved to do so that he wouldn't argue with me about what occupied my time anymore. When I worked late at work, I made sure it was during the same time that he was at work so we had more time together. He, other the other hand, would leave work early to go fuck her in the backseat of our family SUV while I was home doing laundry.

[This message edited by onthefence123 at 5:22 PM, April 1st (Monday)]

Wiserallthetime

It looks a disaster in the making

You saved yourself and kids

You are a hero

“I was lonely”

I asked how many times he said love you too-“once, twice, 2-5 times, no twice”

I asked what she was to him-“like a best friend” then I said I’m suppose to be your best friend-so he said “she was like my whore”

He never once tried to blame me. Immediately took responsibility for what he did.

My W gave me a version of.

"Well you should feel better, YOU won".

When I asked her about OM1 she told me "but I chose you", I never made her enter a contest or put another woman before her.

Sorry for this brief thread-jack:

Thanks, Max... You're actually the second person to call me a hero; the other said it about the way I handled the hospital episode and said I was her hero....

I don't feel like a hero; I feel like I am now just able to tread water okay - the first time I was called one, I felt like I was barely keeping my head above water.

This crap will continue until either xwh gets his head out of his butt and ditches mow, or he dies; I'm not counting on the first. With his health issues, the second will come sooner rather than later, and I hope it comes early enough for my kids to have the least amount of damage possible at this point. (That's terribly sad for me to be saying about someone I had pledge my own life to over 25 years ago...)

End thread-jack

Wiserallthetime

When I say you are a hero then you are a hero

End of discussion

And sometimes in life you need put emotions aside and be a realist

D Day 1/16/2019. The most hurtful reply... let me count the ways. “It just happened . I have no idea why, „. She’s a good person. After telling me they ended it “I don’t know why I canohave a pet,WS is 75,AP is 70. Im57, currently reside g I. Hell. She says I’m the one for her, and says all the right things, comes to therapy, but still seeks contact even though she says the AP has backed off.

“She really is a nice person “.” We are BFFs”. “ it’s a deeply emotional loving relationship “. “ I love you more “. When asked to explain his love for AP. I’m sure I’ll think of more.

I guess I should count myself fortunate that out of all the shitty things she said, she never once referenced AP or threw out any comparisons. I think she grasped her own selfishness but just didn't care. She *deserved* the affair...

Wiserallthetime

When I say you are a hero then you are a hero

End of discussion

Ditto

I found that Best Wife Ever shirt when I was moving out and I nailed that mother fucker to the headboard!

HeHadADoubleLife - YOU are the reason I smiled today.

When I told my H I wanted the OW out of his office and begged him in tears to remove her, he replied, “I just can’t do that to her. It would crush her. She needs this job to help pay her family’s bills.”

When they’re in it, the honestly don’t care what their BS feels. It’s like our feelings don’t even exist.

Chaos - glad to be of service!

I also may have prominently displayed one of the giant dildos I found under his side of the bed, along with some of my underwear that he had torn up and used to masturbate with, and a butt plug.

This display may have been OW’s new pillow - aka what used to be MY pillow.

Oh and I dumped the entire bottle of baby oil that I found accompanying the dildo and butt plug on the sheets.

Hell hath no fury and all that

I also may have prominently displayed one of the giant dildos I found under his side of the bed, along with some of my underwear that he had torn up and used to masturbate with, and a butt plug.

I hope you added the bolt cutters, too!

HeHadADoubleLife

OK that's tooooo much information

Where do I start? Which DDay?

He claimed I was “too black and white “

‘ too hard driving”

‘ our marriage was already over”

And the classic” ILYBINILWY’

Cheater handbook goodies

"I didn't think you'd be that upset. "

"I got rid of everything. There was one video that I put on a CD that I broke when we got engaged."

(Fast-forward to)

"The video was put onto 2 CD's. I broke them both."

(Fast-forward to)

"I didn't remember taking those 3 different videos and had no clue they were still on my computer."

(She had been telling him how she "rewatches the videos" of them to get off)

The absolute WORST though...

"I didn't mean anything I said. By that point, I was just responding by rote and the words were just what I knew what he wanted to hear."